http://subscene.com/u/659433 Improved by: @Ivandrofly
MEN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY
ALL CLAMOURING
MAN: Gentlemen, we are in danger. There is a storm coming.
My men are terrified. We must leave
ROBERT: That tomb is here somewhere. I can feel it.
- Please, Robert, it's been two months! - Archie, I'm not stopping!
CECIL: Dad
What's going on with this wind, Pop
C.J, go wait in the truck
- I don't want to just wait in the truck. - I said go! Windows up!
SIGHS
Robert
- MAN: Mr. Fredericks! - What?
WIND HOWLING
Ah
COUGHS
Help
ROBERT: C.J? Are you all right
- Yeah, I'm fine! - I'm coming down!
Yes
BOTH CHUCKLE
I looked for the tomb of Ahkmenrah for 20 years, and what do you do?
You fall right into it
Amir, start loading the trucks
Mr. Fredericks
there is no time
The storm is almost upon us
Then you'd better hurry
Come on. Everybody works
AMIR SPEAKING IN ARABIC
- (SHOUTING IN ARABIC) - (SCREAMING)
Hey! What's the matter with you? Huh
SPEAKING IN ARABIC
He said, "We must leave this place immediately."
MAN CONTINUES IN ARABIC
If anyone disturbs this tomb
MAN CONTINUES IN ARABIC
the end will come
REPEATS IN ARABIC
The end will come
We load the trucks
SHOUTING IN ARABIC
MEN CLAMOURING
WIND HOWLING
MAN SHOUTING IN ARABIC
I can't help feeling we're making a terrible mistake!
We're not making a mistake, we're making history!
Don't worry
C.J! Let's go
The end will come
HAMMER POUNDING
WOMAN: Welcome, everyone, to the Grand Reopening...
of the newly renovated Hayden Planetarium...
here at the Museum of Natural History
New York's glitterati have all turned out...
for what has promised to be a memorable evening...
filled with the dazzling special effects...
and technical wizardry we've all come to admire from this museum...
and its renowned Night Program
Tonight gonna be fun-fun
Here come Dum Dum
Hey, how we doing, Sac
Rexy is waxed and buffed
Teddy is grooming his moustache
Oh, and I reviewed fire safety procedures with the primordial men.
By the way, have you seen them lately
- The museum has added a new one. - LARRY: What? No.
Oh, and make sure the centurions stretch, all right?
They really went for it in the dress rehearsal...
and they're just not used to those kinds of dance moves.
Okay, everybody. Everybody, listen up. I don't want to make anybody nervous...
but the mayor and the governor are both out there.
And, uh, I'm not 100 percent sure, but I think Regis Philbin, too.
(GASPS) Reeju Philbo?
Yeah, Reeju Philbo
- Okay, Rexy, do me a favor. - (GRUNTS)
Watch the tail, okay? There's gonna be open flame.
Oh, Dexter
how you doing, my man
All limbered up
Looking good. I like the tie
Got kind of a Chippendales thing going on.
- All chalked up, ready to go? - (CHATTERS)
Good. Okay, everybody relax and have fun, okay?
AHKMENRAH: Larry
You better come see this
CONTINUES CHATTERING
- Have you ever seen it like this before? - Never.
AHKMENRAH: This corrosion has never happened before.
It's always been exactly the same
I wonder what's up with it
I have no idea
And to be honest
my father knew the secrets of the tablet better than I did.
Unfortunately, he swore he'd never reveal them.
He never did
- (GASPS) - Whoa!
You okay
Yes
Yes, I'm fine
Just take it easy out there tonight, all right?
You got 15 minutes till showtime
We're gonna figure this out tomorrow
All right
- (OCTAVIUS LAUGHING) - JEDEDIAH: Look at that!
Doggone it
- (CATS MEWING) - OCTAVIUS: Did you see that?
They're trying to catch the light
But you can't do it, boys! You can't catch light!
It's as elusive as human happiness
LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY
I should like to comment
- Summon the apparatus. - Yeah.
Summon the apparatus
What are you gonna say
L
O
L
KEY POUNDING
"Laugh out loud." Yeah, that's what I did.
Now, post these adorable kittens
with my edict of approval to Facebook
Give a big Texas "hell yeah" from old Jedediah...
because I loved it too
Just send a smiley face
Yeah, but with a wink
- A smiley face and a wink! - (KEYS POUNDING)
Guys, what are you doing
We're just watching kittens
You're on in five minutes. You got to focus, here.
I told you we don't have time for this
You gave it a Texas "hell yeah
- Hey, Teddy, ready to roll? - Indeed, Lawrence.
- Great. - Battle of San Juan Hill cool as a cucumber.
Right now, butterflies like you wouldn't believe.
You're gonna be great
- Lawrence? - Yeah.
Have you seen the Neanderthals lately
No. Why does everybody keep talking about this?
You may want to give it a look
MAMMOTH BELLOWING
NEANDERTHALS GRUNTING
Hey, guys, what's going on
GRUNTING EXCITEDLY
ALL: Ooh
Okay
All right, very funny
- That's hilarious. - (GRUNTING SOFTLY)
You don't have to come down. It's okay, really.
Hi, how are you? I'm Larry
I'm Laaa
You're "Laaa
Laaa
Laaa. Okay, nice to meet you, Laaa
Welcome aboard, and
Yes, we look similar
Yeah, we look like each other, I know. It's a joke that somebody played.
Dr. McPhee had you made to look like me
It's just a
GRUNTING SOFTLY
- (YELPS) - Stop it. Stop, okay?
- Dada? - What?
Dada
No, not your Dada
Yeah, Dada
- No. Stop. - Dada.
- Dada! - ALL: Dada!
No, I'm not his... I'm not your Dada
Dum Dum got a new son-son
- (GRUNTING) - No, he doesn't.
Dada
ALL: Dada
DR. MCPHEE: A toast to our new chairwoman
Cheers, everyone. Cheers
- Cue the music. - (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)
And Teddy in three, two
APPLAUSE
Since 1869, when I was a mere boy of 11...
this museum has been a shining beacon to our great city.
Tonight we'll expand our horizons even further...
to the Sun
- the Moon, and the stars. - (MOUTHING)
From our very beginning
mankind has looked to the heavens
and given names to what he saw
The constellations
I thought you might like to meet them
(WHISPERS) Cue the constellations.
AUDIENCE GASPS
- (CHUCKLES) - Wow.
AUDIENCE GASPS
CHUCKLES LIGHTLY
Orion, the hunter
GASPING CONTINUES
CHUCKLES
What
- (YELPS) - (AUDIENCE LAUGHING)
All planned. All planned
I knew that was gonna happen. So, yeah
Good. Going great, guys. Going great
Let's drop the silks
And go with the monkey
- (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) - What?
CHUCKLES
CHATTERING
Come on
- (GRUNTS) - (AUDIENCE GASPS AND CHEERS)
CONTINUES CHATTERING
That's what I do
TEDDY: Thank you for your patronage
and for your unwavering support of this fine institution.
This newly renovated planetarium will serve as a lens...
LAUGHING
JABBERING INCOHERENTLY
"Once more unto the breach, dear friends!"
What
JABBERING CONTINUES
SCREECHING
Charge
AUDIENCE GASPS
Rough Riders
- It's okay! Just hang on! - Is this part of it?
LARRY: Sorry folks, a little technical issue. What are you doing?
- Stick to the script. Stick to the script! - Huh?
- It's me! - I don't know you.
ATTILA SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY
ALL SHOUTING
- (ALL SHOUTING) - (AUDIENCE SCREAMING)
JEDEDIAH: Pull
I don't know what's come over me, but I like it!
Drop 'em
- (SCREAMING) - Ha-ha!
Yeah! Yeah
SHOUTING ANGRILY
What's going on
Do something
BOTH SCREAMING
GRUNTING EXCITEDLY
- ALL: Oh! - (CHATTERING)
What are you doing
Ah
GROANING
CHEERING
GRUNTING
LARRY: Orion, don't
LAUGHS
- (ALL CLAMOURING) - (REXY ROARS)
Rexy
ROARS
Guys, what was going on out there
LAAA GRUNTING INCOHERENTLY
- Seriously, what were you thinking? - (CONTINUES GRUNTING)
Laaa, I got this, all right
Just... Go over there
No, go over there
Go
Attila
what were you doing to that dolphin, man?
It's a dolphin
It's one of the most peaceful creatures on earth...
and you're hacking into it like it was The Cove or something.
Did you see the look on Regis Philbin's face?
Reeju
Yeah, Reeju
Teddy, what were you doing pointing a gun at me?
Forgive me, Lawrence. I don't know what came over me.
Do you even remember that
- Not at all. - (MACHINE POWERING UP)
- (ELECTRICITY CRACKLING) - (LAAA GRUNTING)
Laaa, shut that down! It's a defibrillator.
Put it down. It's dangerous
Laaa, that's electricity. Those aren't headphones.
Stop it
Oh ! Hey! Whoa! Dexter
What are you doing
- (CHATTERS) - LARRY: Huh?
Honestly, if you're gonna act like a baby,
then I'll get you some diapers
You want diapers again? Huh
- (CHATTERS) - JEDEDIAH: Whoa! Whoa!
Ease up on the reins there, hoss
Can't you see? He feels terrible
Hell, we all do
LARRY: I don't know what's going on with everybody here...
but tonight was really weird. Really weird.
OCTAVIUS: We feel awful
Something took hold of us like an evil spell!
JEDEDIAH: Yeah, like we just weren't ourselves.
GRUNTING
MOBILE RINGING
- LARRY: Hello? - DR. MCPHEE: Larry.
Hey, Dr. McPhee
Yeah, hi. How's it going
- (ELEVATOR BELL DINGS) - Uh, okay.
Good, good, good, good, good, good
You know that sound of when you're hiding in a trash bin...
fearing for your life because a Tyrannosaurus Rex is using it as a Hacky Sack?
No. I don't know that sound
You don't know that sound? Oh, hold on one second.
That's the sound! That's the sound! It will haunt my dreams!
I'm sorry. Look, really, I'm sorry
I swear to you, I had no idea this was going to happen.
I had no idea it was gonna happen
"I'm only in charge of all the special effects."
It was your fault! They were your special effects!
- (STAMMERING) No, I know. - That's a joke.
Special effects"? More like "special
"defects!" (MANIACAL LAUGHTER)
Look, I promise you, I'm gonna find out what happened.
- Or they were "special rejects!" - (LOUD MUSIC PLAYING)
I'm sorry, Dr. McPhee. I gotta go
LAUGHING AND WHOOPING
- (MUSIC BLARING) - Hey!
Nicky! Nicky! Stop hopping
MUSIC STOPS
Dad, what are you doing
What are you doing
It's 3:00 AM
All right, party's over
- Hey. - Hey.
Who are you
- I'm Sophie. - Sophie?
Bye Bye Birdie
- Right. - It was good.
- Thanks. - Yeah.
See you tomorrow night
- Probably not. - Probably.
Definitely not
Bye
You're in so much trouble
I know
I didn't really know you were coming home early.
Yeah, that's pretty obvious
I mean
what makes you think this is okay
When I'm not at Mom's you leave me alone, like, every night.
Look, you can't be doing this right now
You got finals, your NYU application is due in what, two weeks?
I'm not gonna get into NYU
- You don't know that. - No, I do.
You don't know that
I do very much know that, in the sense that I don't intend to apply.
What
I don't think that it's the place for me right now, Dad.
Okay. All right, fine. You want to spread your wings a little...
get out of the city, go to school somewhere else.
I totally support that. All you had to do was tell me.
Where do you want to go
- What's the list? - It's a short list.
Great. I like it. Focus
I'mma hit you with a super short list, man, because it's...
There's nothing on it
SIGHS
There's
I'm confused, because there's not a list...
Dad
Mmm-hmm
I want to take a year off
I would like to do exactly what you just said.
I want to spread my wings
You want to spread your wings, that's great.
But you can't spread your wings and fly to nowhere.
- Plans change. - No, they don't.
No, they don't. Plans don't change
We had a plan, it changed
- It's disorienting at first. - No.
You can't change the plan
unless you check with the people who are financing the plan...
which is, last time I checked, your mother and I. Okay?
Dad, we could sit here and just have this conversation about plans...
but for now, let's call it a night
Let's not even clean up, right
Let's come back tomorrow
Let's reboot the whole energy, the whole tone of this puppy...
and we'll kill it, man
Team Daley! Not tonight, tomorrow
Hey, Team Daley
- Yeah? - Stop talking.
Okay
You're gonna clean up. I'm gonna go to bed.
And then we're gonna finish this conversation tomorrow.
MUSIC PLAYING
Yeah! Get some
Get some
That's it. Yeah
Hi
I'm Larry Daley. I'm head of the Night Program.
I know who you are. You're the security guard.
Yeah, also head of the Night Program
I'm doing some research
and I was wondering if you could help me out.
Mmm. Night guard doing research
Ooh la-la
Yeah
Uh, I'm just looking for anything
that you might have on the tablet of Ahkmenrah.
Center aisle
- Great. - Halfway down, stacks on your left.
GROANS
Get it
So
what makes you so curious about the tablet?
Oh! Just, uh
Just a hobby, you know? Kind of an interest of mine.
I wish I could talk to these guys
Well, you can't
Yeah
Because they're dead
Right
But, uh, look at that one
Looks like a kid, huh
CHUCKLES
SIGHS DEEPLY
You didn't know him, did you
C.J Fredericks
He worked here
- He worked here? - Yeah, when he grew up.
- No. - Yeah.
He was a night guard
Same as you
Wait a minute. C.J
C.J Fredericks
Cecil Fredericks
Sexiest night guard we ever had
Present company included
Boy, could that man move
MUSIC PLAYING
Larry
Hey, Cecil
My God, it's been years
You look like you're doing pretty good
I've still got it, pal
What are you doing here
I need to talk to you about the tablet
What the heck is Short Stack doing here
Hey, Gus. You're looking well
Reginald
Are you here to frame us again
Send us back to the slammer
I didn't frame you. You were actually stealing.
And I was the one that got you out of jail, so...
- Yeah. - We've got a nice life here.
The past is the past. We've moved on
I don't think this guy's moved on
Listen to him, monkey face
REGINALD: We've put all that tablet stuff behind us, Larry.
It's old news
Besides, we really never knew anything about that old tablet.
We just worked there
Something's up with it
I told you, I can't help you
Maybe this kid can
Maybe we'd better talk alone
CECIL: Expedition like that is a pretty amazing thing...
for a 12-year-old boy
I tried to move on
but there was something about that tablet.
It's turning green, like some sort of corrosion.
And something's happening to Teddy and Dexter...
Jed and Octavius
They're all acting weird
It's like the green rust is affecting them.
The end will come
What
The locals, they warned us
They begged us to leave that tomb alone
I thought it meant the end of the world
But maybe it meant the end
End of the magic
We should have listened
Should have listened
Instead, we shipped Ahk and the tablet off to New York...
and his folks to England
Wait. Wait
Ahkmenrah's parents are in England
It was a joint expedition
Some of the artifacts stayed in Egypt
The rest was divided up between New York and the British Museum.
Ahk said that his father knew the secrets of the tablet.
I think I have to go talk to him
- I need you to listen to me. - Uh...
Our esteemed chairwoman asked for my resignation.
She said, since the Night Program was my brainchild...
that the buck starts and stops with me
- I can fix it. - How?
I need you to let me take the tablet and Ahkmenrah to London.
Sorry. I'm just processing that
IMITATING ELECTRONIC BEEPING
(ROBOTIC VOICE) Input data analysis.
(NORMAL VOICE) I've just told you I'm being fired,
and the first thing you ask
is if I'd allow you to take some priceless artifacts...
away with you on holiday
- Yes. Please. - No way, José.
I'm asking you to please go with me on this.
- Nah. - Please.
Can't do it, dude
Bye
- Are you gonna mug me? - What?
I don't know. Just be prepared
- I need you to listen to me. - Oh.
- Okay? - Yep.
- You want to know the truth? - Go on.
Truth is, the tablet
The tablet is actually magic
Things really do come to life at night
- It's special effects. - It's not special effects.
How could it be special effects
How could it not be special effects
- Because it isn't! - Of course it is!
- I'm telling you, this is what happens. - What?
Sun goes down
the tablet starts to glow
everything comes to life
- Sure. - It's real.
Tablet starts to glow
Now I know you're mental
- Look, Leslie... - (YELPS)
Listen to me. I'm not gonna hurt you
I know. Just
What
Listen, nobody cares about this place as much as we do, right?
Yeah
If you don't help me
everything that's special about it might stop...
and it may never come back
I'm not asking you to understand, I'm just asking you to trust me.
I'd like to help you
but I don't even work here anymore
British Museum doesn't know that
The mummy and the tablet, both
Classic conservation job
under authority of me, of course
the director of this museum, which I still am.
Yep, okay
You're in
ROCK MUSIC PLAYING
I really could have just stayed by myself in New York.
Yeah. No, that wasn't gonna happen
- Beautiful, huh? - Yeah.
The River Thames
Isn't this cool, man, you and me in London?
- Huh? - Yeah.
Hey, I've been thinking about that, uh, year off.
Yeah
I think it could be cool
- Yeah? - Yeah.
What are you thinking
Yeah. Uh... Wow
I think I want to DJ in Ibiza
In Ibiza
Ibiza, it's a small island off the coast of Spain.
- Do you speak Spanish? - No.
But that's the beautiful thing. It's about the music.
It's not inhibited by the language barrier.
No, but you are
- Do you speak in beats? - Why are you freaking out?
You just said this was a really cool idea.
I'm not freaking out
I just want to understand what the plan is.
You didn't go to college
Wait, now we're talking about not going to college at all?
- Maybe. I don't know. - Nicky.
Nicky. That's not
Dad, you didn't go to college. You turned out fine.
I turned out okay after about 20 years in a lot of dead ends.
Whatever, man
Don't worry about me. It's fine
Hey, I'm always gonna worry about you
- I'm your dad. - Thanks.
Sun is going down. We should get going
All right
NICK: Dad, what's the plan here, anyway
LARRY: When the tablet brings Ahkmenrah to life, he's gonna sneak us in.
- Now, get down. - What?
LARRY: Just get down! Come on, man. Part of the adventure.
Hello. Welcome to the British Museum
My name's Tilly
Hi. Thank you
I'm Larry Daley from Natural History, New York.
- Yeah, yeah. - I got a delivery...
for your conservation department
All right
So they let you travel
This is kind of unusual
Well, they let me travel. You know where?
- No. - Home. Here. Home.
Back here
Off to the toot-toot
Five-minute maximum. (SCOFFS)
FORCED CHUCKLE
So that must be well wicked being a security guard in America.
- Uh... - With your gun, with a silencer,
with your ninja swords
- Right. - (IMITATING BLADES WHOOSHING)
That's not even a little bit true
The only thing that I got is this
- Oh. - Hammer! It's for...
and I quote, "minor repairs and beautifications"
to the shack
Oh
You just hit things
Yeah, that's catchy
Basically worthless
I can't believe we're actually still talking.
- It's great, though, innit? - It is.
This is the most conversation I've had
in the three years that I've worked here.
I feel a connection, too
Is it cool if I just make my drop
- Oh, yeah. - Wonderful.
But I will have to confirm
Actually, that's not necessary
because they've already confirmed it on the slip I gave you.
Yeah, all right. Confirming
- Okay. - TILLY: All right.
- (KEYPAD BEEPING) - (LINE RINGING)
DR. MCPHEE: Hello. This is Dr. McPhee
It's the British Museum, sir
I'm just confirming a delivery to our conservation department.
Yes, I signed the paperwork
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a museum to run.
You, boy, get those grubby fingers off my Ming vase.
See? Bye
All right
- Good? - All right, you is legit.
I is legit
- Wonderful. - Confirm it.
- Thank you. - All right, I'll open the gate.
Okay
TILLY: Yeah, so, like, my boyfriend
he doesn't really like the way I do my hair.
Says it looks like a golden poo sitting on my shoulder.
- But I really enjoy it. - Mmm-hmm.
Bye, Larry
SNORING
I'm not an expert
but this is feeling, just, really against the law.
No, they have a totally different legal system here.
Okay
How we doing
All clear
All right, let's go
Larry, the others felt, perhaps, we could use some help.
The others
Lawrence, I couldn't sit idly by
Our very survival is at stake
All right. Hey, Teddy. Good
Good man to have in a crisis
Attila
Okay, a little muscle
SACAJAWEA: Hi, Larry
That is a deceptively large box
Obviously, we came along, too
You know you'd be lost without us, Gigantor.
Are you serious
CHATTERING
And the monkey. All right, basically everyone.
Dada
Oh! No, no
No possible benefit whatsoever
He really wanted to come
LARRY SIGHS
Yeah, this is my son
my actual son, Nicky
- Nicky, this is Laaa. - What's up?
GRUNTS
He's just tracking me
IMITATING MOCKINGLY
- Laaa. - (GRUNTS)
TEDDY: So, Lawrence what's the plan of attack?
We need to get to the Egyptian wing, find Ahk's father...
- and hopefully get the tablet fixed. - Huh?
- (GIGGLING) - LARRY: All of us.
Laaa, that's not for eating. That's not food.
Don't
You know what? I got a job for you
Come on, come on
Come on
I want you to stay here and watch this door, okay?
Make sure nobody comes in or out. Okay
Good. You're gonna be a guard, just like me.
- All right. - (GRUNTING EXCITEDLY)
No. Come here
Stay here
and put your hands on the door
- Good, stay. - Stay!
Good. That's right. You stay here
Stay here
Stay. Right
No. Stay
- Stay! - Stay.
Look there. Good. Stay
No. Good. Stay
No. Stay
Stay
Don't... Don't move
Don't move
No. Good. Okay
Okay, listen up, guys
This place is waking up for the first time...
and we have no idea what's out there, so stay together, all right?
ATTILA SPEAKING IN LOCAL DIALECT
LARRY: I know it's spooky, big guy
Just stay close
DEXTER CHATTERING
JEDEDIAH: What kind of haunted hootenanny is this, boys?
We're all finding this super creepy, right?
LARRY: They're just a little freaked out
First time we came alive it took some getting used to.
Hey, there. Just heading to Egypt
- Come on. This way. - (ANIMALS GRUNTING)
LOUD THUDDING
THUDDING CONTINUES
Hear that
Hear what
That
GROWLING
(WHISPERING) We'll just be down here if anyone needs us.
We're not scared. It's just more comfortable.
TEDDY: Lawrence
I think it's safe to say that we're in a bit of trouble.
I know how to handle this guy
- You mind? - (SNORTING)
- Thanks. - Dad, what are you doing?
How do you think I tamed your pal Rexy
Hi, there
I bet you're not so mean, are you? Huh
I bet you're not so mean
No, you're just a little puppy, right
You're just a little puppy who wants to play.
You want to play, huh
Want to play fetch
Yeah
You want to play with this bone
Ah! Yeah
- (WHINING EXCITEDLY) - Here you go. Go fetch.
Go fetch
GAGGING
- Lawrence? - Yeah?
- May I suggest a different plan? - What?
- (ROARING) - Run!
ALL PANTING
ROARING CONTINUES
Close it, close it
Okay. I think we're
GROANING
Get back! Everybody, get back
All right. You don't want to fetch
- Fetch on this. - What?
SHOUTING
Oh! Oh! Ah
- Oh, that's close! - Need some help?
- What? - Move.
GRUNTING
LAUGHS
ATTILA SHOUTING IN LOCAL DIALECT
- Whoa! - (GROANS)
Attila, you okay
Whoa
Oh
GASPS
KNIGHT LAUGHING
- You might want to... - No.
Here
- hold this. - (GROANS)
WHINING
That was actually very cool
Sir Lancelot, at your service
Thank you. That was amazing
TEDDY: Theodore Roosevelt
President of the United States of America.
I have no idea what that means
I'm Larry, and this is my son, Nick
You have a noble face, Nick
- Thanks. - Thanks for the help.
Now, you
You remind me of a man I once knew at Camelot.
Really
One of the Knights of the Round Table
No, Erik
Erik
Our fool
He was the funniest fool I ever met
He was so good, he didn't even have to do anything.
He could just walk into a room and you'd laugh.
- Hmm. - (CHUCKLES)
- You have what he had. The gift. - That's weird.
- You could be a fool. - I don't know about that.
Oh, come on, of course you could
We'd get you one of those hats with the funny little dangly bells.
Dangly bells
LAUGHS
(CHUCKLING) Hmm?
Dangly bells
Didn't I tell you? The gift
He does what seems like nothing
A sort of deadpan
tiny little
Hmm." "Hmm
Expressionless, you know, sort of a
Hmm. Hmm
sort of thing
Just like Erik
Sounds like a great guy. We got to get going, so...
Ah, Camelot
Okay
Someday, I shall return to its mighty towers...
to King Arthur
and Queen Guinevere
Sweet
beauteous Guinevere
But I'm sworn not to until I have completed my quest.
I must find the Holy Grail
Well, good luck with that
And thanks for the help again
We got to get to Egypt, so we'll see you.
- I will lead you. - No, it's okay.
Halt, Dangly Bells
There is strange magic in the air, and dangerous beasts are afoot.
It is the duty of a true knight
to protect and care for those in need
We're off
I guess he's coming with us
Larry
SPEAKING IN LOCAL DIALECT
- Jed and Octavius? - (CONTINUES)
They must have fallen out while we were running.
Jed
Octavius
Jedediah
- Jed! - Octo!
LARRY: Oh, no
NICK: Is that Octavius's cape
Here
- Nicky. - Yeah.
Guys
BOTH SCREAMING
Gigantor
Jed
They won't last long in those heating vents, Lawrence.
At their size, they'll bake like tiny little scarabs in the Sinai.
Too dark
Ah
WIND HOWLING
SOFT WHIRRING
SCREAMING LOUDLY
WHIRRING CONTINUES
SCREAMING CONTINUES
This is the end, boy
This is the last roundup
Hold my hand
Why
Never mind
BEEPING
BOTH GROAN
JEDEDIAH: We're a long way from home, boy
Did you ask me to hold your hand
No
Mmm-hmm
ATTILA: (SHOUTING) Jedo
Octo
SPEAKING IN LOCAL DIALECT
They could be anywhere between here and the intake vent.
- (CHATTERING) - What do you see, Dex?
You know he's a monkey, Lawrence
He can't talk
No, but he can fit
Nicky... give me your phone
- Why? - For Dex.
I don't understand one thing that's going on here.
I don't, either. Dad, what's going on
I'm sort of set up to track your phone
You're sort of set up to track my phone? You track my phone?
Yeah, I'm your dad. I'm looking out for you.
No. No. Hold up
"Spying on" is not the same thing as just looking out for someone.
You'll get it back, I promise
But right now, it's going on the monkey's back.
All right. Dex, come here
Thanks, man
Listen. I need you to go down there and find them, all right?
- Think you can handle it? - (CHATTERING)
Good man
Stay safe
I think it's right here
LAUGHS
Right here
Classic
Ah, the gift of laughter
Thank you, Dangly Bells
ELEPHANTS TRUMPETING
First quest
Uh, not exactly
I thought you were going to Egypt
We are, but we got to do this first
That's not how a quest works
A quest is one thing. It's not, like, "Holy Grail and a monkey."
Yeah, well, my guys are missing and Dexter's gonna find them.
SIR LANCELOT: What is the quest? Gold
Fountain of Youth
Magic tablet
It's that thing Ahk is holding
It shouldn't be too hard to take it from him.
He seems well-toned and lean
but weak
It would be like taking candy from a feeble Egyptian baby.
No, we're not trying to take it, we're trying to fix it.
There's something wrong with it
It's kind of complicated
It might be less complicated if you stopped following a chimpanzee.
He's not a chimpanzee, he's a capuchin
The fool seems agitated
That's often his way
But I assure you, he's no fool
Is it true what he says
The tablet that you carry is magic
It is, indeed
Everything around you has come to life tonight for the very first time...
- all because of this tablet. - (SCREECHING)
ATTILA MUTTERING
Amazing
Then they're not real
They're as real as any of us
Yes, but we're real people
They're just things
And they don't even know
They must be unbelievably stupid
It can be confusing at first
CROAKING
Hello, frog
Keep hopping
You're real
Guys, I think we're gonna have to cut through Asia.
Not a clue
None
I can't really see much
We could jump down, hope for the best
But we have no idea what's down there
METAL CREAKING
We don't know what's up here, either
SCREAMING
CHATTERING
This is a Roman city
I can feel the familiar pull of history in its very foundations.
Where the heck is everybody
I've seen this town before, I'm sure of it.
Romans
I see you have the name of a lady on your arm.
Andrea. Yeah
So this Lady Andrea is your Guinevere
Does any man stand between you and your ladylove?
Yeah, actually. My dad kind of messed things up the other night.
- Nick. - Oh, we're stopping.
Let no man stand between you and your destiny.
Oh, "destiny" may be overstating it a bit.
We just have calculus together
It's more one of those
fleeting moments of eye contact
Who's gonna look away first
But I get you. No man
- Good. - Okay.
Iiepwop
Doesn't ring a bell
MUFFLED SHOUTING
Now who's this son of a gun
CONTINUES SHOUTING
- (MUFFLED) Pompeii! - I'm sorry.
- I'm having trouble hearing you! - Pompeii!
No comprendo, amigo
because you got the thing in front of you!
- (CROWD CLAMOURING) - What are they doing?
Where in the blazes are they stampeding off to?
Was it something we said
ROARING
- (LAUGHING) - (ROARING)
Come on back to liepwop
- There's plenty of room! - Come on back!
They're as crazy as road lizards
People are strange
Oh
Hey, guy. We're just passing through
CHATTERING
- It's a Garuda from Tibet. - A Garuda?
Hi, Garuda. How you doing
Garuda! How you doing
Cool, great
Okay. We just
You know what? We just got to get through. I don't have time.
Please. Okay
CONTINUES CHATTERING
I'm not gonna play this game with you
I got to go through. Really
(WHISPERING) Get back.
- A dragon. - No, it's not a dragon. It's a...
It's a Xiangliu
Mythical snake demon
It looks like a dragon. I say we kill it.
What? No, it's asleep
You're right. It's not very sporting to kill it while it's asleep.
Let's wake it up and then kill it
I shall go first, and I shall take the boy.
What are you...? No! You're not gonna take the boy.
- Why not? - Because he's a boy!
Larry, there comes a time in every man's life...
when he must slay his own dragon
Not this kid, all right
He still hasn't finished all his thank-you notes from his bar mitzvah.
Anyway, that's just an expression
Not where I come from
He's not gonna slay his dragon right now.
- (SIGHS) - We're gonna go around it.
We're gonna go around now, or else we're gonna lose the signal.
Come on
Iiepwop
(MUFFLED) Pompeii!
Iiepwop. Are you sure you're reading that right, pal?
Hmm
Pompeii
RUMBLING
Oh
Pompeii
BOTH SCREAMING
SNORING
GROANING
- "Ask not what your country can do for you..." - Shh.
Ask what you can do for your country
There it goes again
SCREAMING
Attila! Shh
INCOHERENT JABBER
- Teddy! - TEDDY: Charge!
ATTILA WHIMPERING
Whoa
ROARING
- (SCREAMING) - SIR LANCELOT: Fantastic! It's awake!
Now we can kill it
A-ha
GRUNTING
Whoa
- Attila! - NICK: Dad!
- Nicky! - (GRUNTING)
I'll get the boy
GROANING
- Ever used a blade? - Only in World of Warcraft!
You're about to learn
GRUNTING
BOTH SCREAMING
WHIMPERING
"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself!"
Doing a heck of a job, Brownie
GRUNTS
TEDDY CONTINUES JABBERING
MOANS
Behind you
Duck
SHOUTING VICTORIOUSLY
JEDEDIAH: Last roundup, kemosabe
Time to slap on the barbecue sauce, boy
Huh? What
ROARING
No, no! You wouldn't
He must
Clear
SHOUTING
We must never speak of what happened here today.
Come on! That wasn't necessary
It's out
GROANING
These things really do save lives
CHATTERING
Are you all right
GRUNTS
Are you all right, my dear
- You okay? - Yeah, thanks.
You fought bravely, sire
One day, I promise you,
we shall drink dragon's blood from the Victor's cup.
I'm good with just, like, soda or water, too.
But I like the energy we got going
From now on, you must choose your own path.
And let no man tell you otherwise
We better let Larry know we're okay
Turn around
Larry's probably worried about us
How are we going to find them now
Lawrence
I fear we've turned a corner
I'm becoming wax again, son
All right. We'll look for them later
We got to get to Egypt now
Wait, shouldn't we keep looking for Jed and Octavius?
Nick is right
A true knight never shirks his duties
If we don't get to Egypt soon we're not gonna save anybody.
Dada say, "Stay
Stay
SNIFFING
SIGHS
Dada say Laaa no eat
Stay, Laaa
GRUNTING
SNIFFING
This is it
Perhaps I should accompany you in
No, I think we got it from here
- Really? - Yeah. No, we're good.
Right. Well
friends
Larry
clown-faced keeper of the magic tablet...
I shall never forget your bravery
Nor your jests
Bye
I shall not say goodbye
- I am. - What?
I'm gonna say goodbye. I have to go, I'm sorry.
I'll see you
Really, man, thank you
For everything
I haven't seen these walls for many a moon.
Ahkmen
Mother
Oh
SOBBING
Father
Welcome home, my son
I want you to meet my friends
I am Merenkahre
Pharaoh of the Nile and Father to the Son of the Sun.
And I am Shepseheret
the Glittering Jewel of the Nine Kingdoms.
And I am Larry
Guardian of Brooklyn
Yes
I actually live in Manhattan now
I know, but it doesn't sound as cool
Yeah
We would be very honored if you could take a look at the tablet.
There's something happening with it
We don't understand what it is
You are speaking with a pharaoh
Kiss my staff
Is it okay if I don't
You will show respect
I am the descendant of Ra, the sun god
I understand that and I totally respect you.
I just don't pray to Ra, so
The Egyptian gods are the only true gods.
Well, we try to stay a little more open-minded.
I mean, Sacajawea, she honors her spiritual ancestors...
and you pray to some sort of goat god, Attila?
I'm half-Irish, half-Jewish
You are? I love Jews
We owned 40,000 of them
- Such lovely people. - Here we go.
They were very happy, always singing with the candles.
Yeah. They really weren't happy
- Really? - No. They left.
They spent about 40 years in the desert trying to escape.
- Oh! - (CHUCKLES)
Yeah. We have dinner once a year and talk about it.
It's a big deal for us
Listen, could you take a look at that tablet?
There's something wrong with it
It's losing its power
Do you think you could fix it
To do that, I would have to divulge the secret of the tablet.
I promise we won't tell anybody
No
I'll kiss your staff
Too late
Father, why do you insist on keeping this to yourself?
The secret was to be passed down to you at the proper time.
Well, it has been 4,000 years
Now seems like a good time
You were born at midnight
I was Pharaoh
and I had seen wonders most men only dream of.
- But when I first gazed upon you... - (COOING)
you were instantly more precious to me...
than all the wonders of the ancient world.
I knew I could never bear to say goodbye.
I commanded the High Priest to create a gift to you, my son...
using all we had learned of the mysteries of the afterlife.
Forged in the temple of Khonsu, god of the moon...
- and watcher over nighttime travelers... - (CHANTING)
the Tablet of Ahkmenrah
Our tomb was designed to channel Khonsu's rays down to the tablet...
rejuvenating its powers every night
The moon god bestowed his power upon the tablet...
so that, as long as it bathed in his light...
our family could be together forever,
and not even death could part us
It's been away from Khonsu's light too long.
GASPS
My son
What is happening to you
It needs moonlight
otherwise we shall all be dead by sunrise.
Hurry
If the tablet dies
nothing can bring it back
PANTING
What are you doing
The tablet. Now
Wait, listen to me. That thing is dying
If it doesn't get moonlight
everything ends, like, for real
King Arthur wasted years searching for the Holy Grail.
To think it was a tablet all along
Would you just give it to me? You don't know what you're doing!
My quest is complete
I ride for Camelot tonight
Just keep it, okay
But just put it in the moonlight and turn that center piece.
Sorry, not my first quest
And by the way, Erik was much funnier than you!
Go get the others
We can't let him leave the building
Whoa! Easy there, partner! Slow it down
I don't know who you are
but I'm pretty dang sure that tablet don't belong to you.
- (CHUCKLES) - Now wait a second!
Come back here! This ain't over
You'll rue the day you mocked us with your huge sword
and hypnotic blue eyes
His eyes are very blue
Speak softly and carry a big stick
Lawrence, we have a problem
This one turned to wax as well
I have a saying, too
Speak loudly and carry a bigger stick
BOTH GROAN
- It's over there! - You mean up there.
Come on
Got it
- Teddy. - The tablet, now!
I shan't ask you again, fool
And this is giving me a headache
Give me the tablet
Let me go, Lawrence
No! Teddy, no
Teddy
There
GROANING
That'll be mine
Hey, that was a good one
No idea that would work
TILLY SNORING
SNORTS
LAAA GRUNTING OVER SPEAKERS
Larry
Hey, you guys, how you doing
JEDEDIAH: Still in one piece
- Octavius, I think this belongs to you. - Thank you.
I don't understand
Why is Lancelot staying strong while we get weaker?
It's his first night
Newborns are stronger but it matters not.
Unless we succeed, he, too, will be dead come the dawn.
LARRY: We can't let him leave the building
Sir, can you go back to Egypt, in case he comes through there?
- Of course. - Nicky, take Attila, check the loading dock.
- Got it. - Teddy, go to the South Wing, cover the side doors.
I got the main entrance
PANTING
- SIR LANCELOT: (SHOUTING) Hi-yeah! - (HORSE NEIGHING)
You! I knew you smelled a bit off
- Didn't you just see that? - See what?
The knight on the horse that just rode through!
Stop trying to distract me with your magical fantasy!
I found your filthy twin, here, in the freight room!
He's not my twin
I got him, and what could he say for himself?
IMITATING GRUNTING
- (GRUNTS) - Shut up! Shut up in your face!
Shut up right now! Do you want to be smashed?
Yeah, you can run, but if you leave those gates...
I swear to you, your hideous doppelganger...
who looks a lot like the lead singer of the Counting Crows...
will get it
(WHISPERS) Dada.
That's right
It compute with him
Dada
Damn it
GRUNTING
Laaa
If you see me do something dumb, don't imitate me, okay?
It's basically what I keep telling Nick
He just doesn't get it, you know
I mean, he's a smart kid
but I just want to give him the tools that I didn't have.
I mean, get the degree, then take a break.
Get the degree, then take a break
SCREAMING
Laaa! Laaa, stop that
Stop it
Okay
BOTH EXHALE
ATTILA SCREAMING
What? Excuse me! Hey
Hi. Hey. Sorry
I'm Nick, this is Dexter, Attila the Hun.
Oh, yes, so lovely to meet you
Now meet this hammer
Don't do that
I'm super sorry. I know it's a lot going on, Hun, monkey.
Wow, what? So much weird. Huge amount to process.
Right? Okay, sorry
- Thank you. - You won't get away with this!
I'm making sketches of you in my mind right now!
Boy with freckles,
fat Asian with hair extensions, evil monkey.
I guess it's just parenting, you know
And he comes from a divorced family
so I'm sure he has a lot of conflicted feelings about me...
and there might be some Oedipal stuff at play in there, or...
I get it
I wasn't there a lot of the time
So I think I might be projecting my own guilt...
and taking it out on him in ways
that I'm not even aware of
GRUNTING
What
Door
Head
Okay, I
GRUNTS
YELLS
Open
head
Open your mind
Yes! Yeah, well, you're right
That's the challenge
I mean, it's all contextual, and I do
I keep looking at him through the lens of how my parents raised me...
when, in reality, he's his own person
And, yeah, we share the same DNA
but honestly, he's much more evolved than I ever was.
I don't want to let my own ego and childhood history...
stop him from making the mistakes he needs to make...
to become the person that he's meant to be.
GRUNTS
Oh
Open the door with your head
Yes
- Good, Laaa. Let's go! - Ah!
- Everybody okay? - Yes, Lawrence.
Attila and your boy secured the lady guard in her booth.
I don't know how long it will hold her, though.
We gotta find Lancelot
but somebody has to make sure she doesn't get out.
GRUNTS
Yeah. Laaa, okay
You know what you have to do
Stay
That's right. Just make sure she stays in there.
- Stay! - Good! Go!
Dada say, "Stay
TEDDY: Lawrence
I can't move my arms
We're becoming less useful by the minute.
ATTILA GROANING
Whoa, whoa
Come on, big guy
What? You okay there? Huh
Something's up with your eye, but
SPEAKING IN LOCAL DIALECT
I don't know. It's just kind of going
CONTINUES
- You gotta relax, okay? - (SHOUTING)
Calm down
Attila! Attila
- Hey! - Oh!
Attila doesn't hyperventilate
REPEATING IN LOCAL DIALECT
You pillage
- You plunder! - (MUTTERING)
You don't freak out
- Okay? - (AGREEING IN LOCAL DIALECT)
Dad, there's, like, 8 million people in this city.
He could be literally anywhere by now
We'll find him
We have to
I'm coming, my love
ROARING
MAN: Blimey
He came this way
traveling 4 leagues per hour
- (LIONS ROARING) - (WOMEN SHRIEKING)
No
Never run from a big cat, Lawrence
JEDEDIAH: Gigantor, get your flashlight out!
These cats want to play
Whoo-wee! He's got it, boy
JEDEDIAH LAUGHS
Well played, sir
Run
Where the devil could Lancelot be
LARRY: Come on
You better let me out of here, you revolting ape-man!
What are you staring at? Stop looking at me!
Have you never seen a beautiful, attractive, gorgeous woman before...
who could be a model if she didn't love pizza so much?
I know what you're playing at
and it ain't working
Not working
Wait, it is kind of working
What have they done to Camelot
HUGH JACKMAN: (SINGING) In short, there's simply not.
A more congenial spot
For happily ever-aftering
Than here in
- Camelot. - At long last!
- Guinevere, my love. - Hi.
Can I help you, mate
It is I
Sir Lancelot
I have fulfilled my quest
Sorry. I'm sorry
I'm not actually Guinevere
I'm Alice Eve, and I think you got a bit confused.
- Maybe you saw me on stage... - Your voice is like music...
but I have no idea what you're saying
Okay. Hey
Hey, man. (SNAPS FINGERS)
Hey, buddy. Um
What she's saying is she's not Guinevere because she's an actor.
Okay? So am I
An actor
- Yeah. - Yeah.
You know
Do the crown
Oh, sorry, of course. Hugh Jackman
- (BOTH CHUCKLE) - (AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)
It was the crown
I know, the whole
Huge Ackman
- Uh... - That's a ridiculous name!
It doesn't even sound real
Only a coward would conceal his true identity, Arthur.
No, it's Hugh Jackman
I, on the other hand
carry the treasure you sought
- but could never find. - (AUDIENCE MURMURING)
Behold the key to life everlasting
Okay, I love the costume
I love the enthusiasm
but you're gonna have to get off stage now.
Sir Lancelot, ladies and gentlemen. Sir Lancelot.
Yes
Very good
Shame on you, Arthur
You don't deserve your crown, and you don't deserve your queen!
AUDIENCE GASPS
Prepare to feel the cold kiss of my blade...
Huge Ackman
Hey, buddy, this is all pretend
See, just
Well, that's not real
None of it is
It's not real
It was a good performance
- We were right in there. - You were tonight.
But it's not real-real
It's not real
Not real
Do you know how long I dreamed of Camelot?
SHOUTING ANGRILY
And for what? For nothing
- (AUDIENCE SCREAMS) - Jeez!
Nothing
No, no, no. Please just take your seats and...
MUSIC PLAYING ON SPEAKERS
What's up
We're just as God made us
Why don't you take a picture
It'll last longer
CONTINUES SHOUTING
Okay, I've tried being nice. That's enough.
Get off the stage right now
Stay back! You don't scare me
Huge Ackman
Listen, mate, you don't want to fight me, all right?
If we go, I will break you
Come on
GROWLING
What is that
What are you doing
He's doing his Wolverine thing
- Yeah. - (IMITATING GROWL)
- Yeah. - You know?
It's better with the claws and no shirt
Fair
Lancelot
MAN: Oi, mate
Hey, buddy, that's not an exit
HUGH JACKMAN: Yeah, come on up
Yep. Come on up
Oh, monkeys. Terrific
I love the costumes
Sorry. I just gotta say, you're the whole package, man.
Thanks, buddy
- He recognized you. - Yeah, that was awesome.
Hey! Give me the tablet
Stay back! Stay back
- Stand back! - Whoa!
Back
What
- (GROANING) - Your, uh...
Your nose, it's
What about my nose
Your nose is dripping
- What? - It's melting.
From the fire
SCREAMING
Okay
How bad is it
It is not great
But I'm Lancelot
There never was a Lancelot
Lancelot is a legend
You're not real
I don't understand
I know it's a lot to take in, but please, just give me the tablet.
Oh, and then what? Back to the museum
Stand there as little children ogle and point?
And learn
And get inspired to do great things
There are far less noble fates, my friend.
Not for me, there aren't
If there is no Camelot
there is no Guinevere and no Lancelot
then I'm nothing. I'm just a sad lump of misshapen wax.
Stop looking at my nose
- I wasn't looking at it. - You were, I saw you.
You were like this. "Hmm, hmm." Staring
- I wasn't like that. - You were!
Don't look at it
It really is hard not to look at
Yes, he is
Ah
- I didn't. - I saw you!
No, I'm looking at your eyes
- Monkey, stop it! - (CHATTERING)
Could you give me the tablet, please? Give me the tablet.
If you give me the tablet, I promise I won't...
Do not look at my nose
- Give me the tablet. - Look away.
- Give me the tablet. - How hard could it be not to look at my nose?
I'm not gonna look at your nose
I can't help it
Look to the heavens
(WHISPERS) It's disgusting.
Yet, he's still handsome
No one shall look at, or mention, my nose from this moment forward!
I'm sorry, I forgot what we were talking about.
ATTILA SHOUTING
Lawrence
Oh, Teddy
Larry
We've run out of time
Listen to me. You got to straighten the pieces.
Straighten the pieces right now or they're all gonna die!
You too
A world without Camelot is not a world worth living in.
SHRIEKING
Dad
Dexter, what is it
You all right
Hey
Hey, man, you okay
Hey, look at me
Yeah, you want to slap me? Go ahead
Go ahead, slap me in the face
Dex
Dexter
Oh! No, no. No
Dexter? No, no. Come on, man
Dad, he's gone
I'll take that hand now
I understand now
The monkey was the quest
It was never about the tablet
It was about them
Forgive me
It is I who have been the fool
GASPS
We're back, baby
Lawrence
Whoa
Hey
Welcome back, buddy
WHIMPERS
Hey
OCTAVIUS: Well done, Larry
There he is. That's our guy
Come here
Here's your tablet
OCTAVIUS: It feels good, doesn't it, Jedediah?
JEDEDIAH: Boy, you said it
Hey. Thank you
How do I look
You look like Lancelot
Well done, my child
Thank you
for bringing my son home safely
It's a strange thing
seeing your boy become a man
There were lions chasing us
Hmm
Yeah, it's crazy
One day, they're riding a dinosaur through Central Park...
and then the next day they're DJ-ing in Ibiza.
You've served my family well
We shall build a great tomb and bury you with many riches.
I, personally, will see to it that your organs are removed...
and placed in separate Jewel-encrusted jars.
Thank you
SACAJAWEA: It's the right thing to do
TEDDY: Then we're agreed
Lawrence
may I have a word
Yeah
The others and I have been talking
Ahkmenrah's place is here with his family.
He must remain here
And the tablet should stay here as well, son.
This is where it belongs, Gigantor
Yeah, but it
That means you guys would have to stay
We belong in New York
ATTILA SPEAKING IN LOCAL DIALECT
Yeah, but if you
If you guys go, then you
you won't be alive after tonight
We're museum exhibits, Laredo
It's what we are
Folks come to look at us, maybe learn a little something.
That's alive, man
But I'm
I'm supposed to take care of you guys
And you have
It's okay, Lawrence
We're ready
I'm not
Let us go, son
Okay
Thank you for giving me back my family, Larry...
Guardian of Brooklyn
Dad, if we leave right now, we can still catch a flight...
get home with everyone still awake before the sun comes up.
Yeah, okay
Let's go home
Whoa
It's all right, Larry
We've reached something of an understanding.
- Really? - Trixey, sit.
Wow! That's really good
Good job, Lance
Thanks
Trixey, behave
Good girl
Steady
TILLY: He never even listens to me
But you
I just feel like you really listen to me.
LAAA GRUNTING
It's like our hearts are in perfect sync with each other right now.
- Um... (CLEARS THROAT) - Do you feel what...
- Oh. - Hi.
Sorry to interrupt whatever
is happening
Uh, Laaa, the guys are waiting outside. We gotta go. Come on.
What? No
No! Laaa, stay
I know this sounds crazy
but you and I could make a life together here in England.
GRUNTS ANGRILY
Whoa
Wow. Okay. Um
SPEAKING GIBBERISH
I will never forget you
REPEATING INDISTINCTLY
You are the most rugged man that I have ever, ever met.
SPEAKING GIBBERISH
Keep the scrunchies
Okay, Laaa. We gotta go
Come on
I won't say anything if you won't
Oh, I know you hate this job and everything, but tomorrow night...
best job ever
CHUCKLES SOFTLY
JEDEDIAH: Sure is quiet around here
OCTAVIUS: Without the tablet, it's just like any other museum.
You know what I'm gonna remember most about you?
What
How big you guys are
Come here
- (LAUGHS) - Come here.
Hold me
My
friend
You speak English
Okay
Hey, listen. Um
Up there on the roof, when
- When you almost... - (CHATTERING)
Yeah
I just want you to know
I really changed my perspective on everything.
I know we have a weird
We have this dynamic, we have this tension.
Back and forth
I mean, games, right? You know
Roles that we put ourselves into, but why does it have to be that way?
I feel like there's always been a mutual
sort of respect for each other
Anyway
I'll miss you, you know
CHATTERING
Okay. It's all right
Go ahead. One last slap
Yeah, I felt that was there for a long time, too.
(MOUTHING) Thank you.
Who would have ever thought
I'm wax, she's polyurethane
But somehow, it worked. (CHUCKLES)
SIGHS
I guess this is it
Indeed
And I know young Nick will do great things.
Yeah, he's, uh
ready to take on the world all by himself.
Then you've done your job
You've done your job
It's time for your next adventure
I have no idea what I'm gonna do tomorrow.
How exciting
Bye, Teddy
Farewell, Lawrence
- Bully! - (SCREAMS)
(LAUGHING) Got you!
Smile, my boy
It's sunrise
- Hey. - Hey. You good?
- Yeah, I am. - Good.
So, Ibiza
Yeah. Uh
The whole DJ thing, Dad
I don't know if that's the thing for me...
I just know that it's the next thing
After that, maybe college
I'm figuring it all out, you know
Sounds like a plan
I should get back to Mom's, or something.
Okay
I love you
I love you, too
All right
I'm not gonna let you go
(CHUCKLES) Okay. I'll see you later.
DR. MCPHEE: Three years, no Larry Daley
He was the one that took the fall for me, got me my job back.
I heard he went back to school, got his degree, became a teacher.
I'm very glad
Well, when he heard about this traveling exhibition...
Larry insisted that I deliver this to you personally.
Ah! The infamous, supposedly magic, glowing tablet.
Larry Daley and his fanciful tales
Larry said you could be trusted
What do you mean
(WHISPERING) With the top secret knowledge.
What are you doing
- I'm winking. - You're blinking.
No, I wink with both eyes
That's blinking
It doesn't matter, because right now
you better get ready
For what
For this
It does glow
Uh-huh
CHEERING AND WHOOPING
MUSIC PLAYING
Come on
MUSIC CONTINUES
Sorry
Go ahead
Have fun-fun, Dum Dum
CHATTERING
Ah
Stay
I'm not going anywhere
Stay
I'm not going anywhere
SCRATCHING
http://subscene.com/u/659433 Improved by: @Ivandrofly