The Break-Up
(CROWD CHEERING)
Come on, come on, come on.All right, here we go.
MAN: Take a seat, buddy!
Come on.It was a good play.
Are you gonna belike this all day?
I don't know. Is it gonnabe like this all day?
I don't know.It's up to you.
I have no room to sit.I got no room to sit.
I'm sitting next toa guy who's sitting
like he's at homeon the toiletwith his legs spread.
Please don't crowd people.Relax, please. Look at me.
I am relaxed.Look how I'm sitting.
Why are yousitting like that?Because... What do you think?
Why'd you wake me upfor this shit?
Because I'm trying to relaxand have a nice day.
Sweating in the sunlike a Tijuana whore.
VENDOR: Ice-cold soda!
Get your soda here!
VENDOR: On the right.Coming down there.Pass that on down there.
Hey, hot dog guy,can I get six hot dogsdown here, please?
Right away.GARY: And make it right,please.
You know, with the mustardand the ketchupand the relish.
Don't make mehit you up for more.
I thought we were goingto Wiener Circle after this.
We will.Then why are yougetting hot dogs?
Pass this down, please.You can keep the change.
Do you wantone of the hot dogs?
GARY: You can have a hot...You want a hot dog?
Do you want a hot dog, miss?
No. Thank you.You can have one.
That's okay.Go ahead.You can have a hot dog.
No, I don't want one.Excuse me, sir?
Would you mindpassing the ladyone of the hot dogs?
I'm good, thanks.You don't have to share.
You can have your own.Thanks. That's reallynice of you.
Just have one, please.Okay, give me a hot dog.
Somebody give her a hot dog.I got... The big guy can'teat all of them. Have one.
Have you ever had one before?A hot dog?
At the ballpark?I have. I believe I have.
Okay, good.Thank you.
Well, enjoy this one.Thanks.
Do you like mustard?No, I'm okay.
It's much betterwith a topping. Here.
I'm just kidding,I'll give you two.
(CROWD CHEERING)
Cheers!Thanks.
We'll share it.
It's a good dog.I like the hot dog. I know.
That's nice.
You have a problemwith me eating a hot dog,guy?
I'm trying to watch the gameand have a hot dog.
I'll smack himin his head.No, just leave him alone.
Hey, you wantto go get a drink?No.
I'm with somebody, sorry.
Who? The guy withthe tucked-in shirtand the visor?
What, is that like a brother?The guy was notyour brother, then.
Who is this guy?He's not my brother.
Who's this...I'm getting mad now.I'm jealous. Who is this guy?
Who are you?I don't know.I'm kidding with you.
Who's the guy withthe tucked-in stuff?Is that a boyfriend?
Uh, it's...
I'm going.Do you thinkyou'll marry him?
What?'Cause I knowyou've thought about it.
The first timeyou laid eyes on him,you probably thought,
"I wonder if I could marrythis guy in plaid shorts whotucks his shirt in. No way."
Then when you kissed him,you said, "I can't believe it.
"I had a lot to drinktonight. I'm kissingthe tucked-in guy."
My point is, if you'renot gonna marry him...Yeah.
...and if it's not forever,
then you really don't haveanything to lose intaking me up on my offer.
Uh-huh. Well, I'm gonna go.Okay. Me, too.
Okay.To where? On anice-breaking first date?
Well, no, I don't think...Listen.
If you want to stayoff the marketwhile you're with
I'm-not-the-one-but-I'm-comfortable,then you can do that.
But for all you know,I just offered you
a get-out-of-bored-Iove-for-free cardwith no strings attached.
God, you're crazy.No, I'm not crazy.
And a lot of times people go,"Oh, that's crazy,"
and then they go,"It's genius."
That's what happenedwhen the person invented fire.
They burned that witch.And guess what, then they gotwarm and they ate good stuff.
Now, where are we headed to?Let's not make this weird,
'cause I'm not good on dates.No. You know what?
I'm better just to kind ofhang out and,if we don't have fun,
I might go my separate way.Okay.
I'm not committingto anything. I'll go hang outwith you for a little bit.
That's not gonna happen.But I can't say for sure.
(YOU'RE MY BEST FRIENDPLAYING)
GARY: All right, all right,everybody. Welcome toThree Brothers Bus Tours.
I'm brother number two.It's good to have you here.
That's right, there's plentyof seats here up front.
I promise I won't bite.I'm not a biter.I'm psyched to have you here.
Okay, a couple quickground rules. Pleasedon't jump off the bus.
Weird. Not fun for anybody.
Also, no throwing objectsat pedestrians,
unless, of course,they deserve it. Okay?
We are not at work today.We are on vacation today.
And if you can't blow itout here on the big funny bus,
where the hell can you?
I do split the tipswith my driver, Shondra.
We don't want her back outturning tricks.
That was a weird timefor everyone.Seriously. Honest to God.
And I was a customer.Long time ago.
Come on, everybody,let's get loose!
I'm gonna ask you once.Show me that you mean it.
Don't make me ask you twice.Are you ready to see Chicago?
Are you ready to see Chicago?
That's what I'm talking about.Shondra, put this babyin the air.
Let's get the blood flowing.Let's get everyone upand let's loosen it up.
Coming up here,you're gonna notice
one of the only buildingsto survive the fire of 1871.
That is the originalChicago Water Towerand Pumping Station.
(PHONE RINGING)
CHRISTOPHER: Happy Holidays.Marilyn Dean Gallery.
The artist was inspiredby the neoclassical movement.
CHRISTOPHER: No, she doesn't.
But wanted to reflect itwith an abstract bent.
CHRISTOPHER: Okay, bye-bye.
And how much is it?$35,000.
Happy Holidays.Marilyn Dean Gallery.Hold, please.
Will you excuse mefor a moment?Sure. Go ahead.
Christopher?Yes, sweetie.
Hi, honey.Hi.
Christmas was months ago.Don't remind me.I miss it so much.
Yeah, I know.But today is not a holiday.
I know for a factthat people likemy spirit on the phone
and they dig the energythat I give them.
Okay. I'm just saying,I don't think Marilyn Deanwill "dig" the energy.
Oh, no.She's the one that told meto be creative. So...
I know. It's just... Okay.What is the next holidaycoming?
The Fourth of July,is that what's next?
Well, if you wantto get technical,there's Memorial Day,
there's Flag Day.
Some people recognizeFather's Day as a holiday.I don't.
I get it. I get it.Well, on those daysyou can say, "Happy Holidays."
Every other day,"Good morning, good afternoon,
"good evening,Marilyn Dean Gallery."Okay?
Okay.
I'm so sorry about that.Oh, no.
So, now this is a new pieceby Zakrzewska.
What do you think of this?
Can I be honest with you?Please.
Other than takingan art history classin college,
which I pretty muchslept through, I don't havethe first clue about art
or how to go about buying it.I mean, like that painting.
I mean, I don't see the pointin buying something thatI could have done myself.
Yeah. I completely agreewith you.
You know, an art teacherof mine once said,
"Never buy a piece of artthat you don't have to have."
You know, don't worryabout who the artist isor how much it's worth.
I mean, you have to livewith it every day. You haveto walk by it every day.
You know, you have toreally love it. You haveto really appreciate it.
It's kind of likepicking a mate.
(EXCLAIMING)
GARY: Hey, honey!Hi.
How's it going?BROOKE: It's good.
Oh, wow. You gota lot happening.I know.
Very exciting.I am starving.
Oh, careful. That's really...That's very hot.Oh, that's hot, hot, hot.
Yep.Jesus.
Hey, honey,you've got to really...You should get ready, okay?
Oh, you look great.Thank you.
Got a lot of nice stuff.Got a pizza.
All kinds of stuff.Terrific.
I just need youto decide what to...You know, I did everything.
(TV CLICKS)
(COMMENTATOR CHATTERING)
Gary?Yeah?
Oh, come on! Really?You got three lemons.
What my baby wants,my baby gets. You know that.
Yeah, but I wanted 12.Baby wanted 12.
Why would you want 12 lemons?
Because I'm makinga 12-lemon centerpiece.
So, no one's actuallyeven eating them?They're just show lemons?
Yeah. They're justshow lemons. Shown inthe center of the table.
I'm glad you find thatamusing,
but I cannot fill a vasewith only three lemons.
Well,can't you just use, like,maybe a drinking glass?
I'm not gonna usea drinking...
We could havea smaller versionof a centerpiece.
I'm not gonna usea drinking glassfor our centerpiece.
You know what?I've got an idea.
Why don't we go ahead andscratch the centerpiece ideaaltogether,
because the chickenthat burnt my mouth
could maybe usea little bit of lemonon top of it.
Guess what? Now we've madea better meal versus somethingvisually nice to look at.
What are you do...What's happening here?What are you doing?
What are you doing?(STAMMERING) Oh, I hadsuch a long day on the bus.
I need a little bitof down time.My feet are killing me.
Gary, come on,my feet are killing me, too.I'm exhausted.
I worked all day.Went to the market.
I cleaned this entire condoand then I've been cookingfor the last three hours.
Come on. Help set the table.
GARY: Sweetheart.What?
You've done such a great jobalready. Don't you wantto finish it yourself
and have that personal powerof that accomplishment?
Set the table.Listen to me.
Do you think thatwhen Michelangelo, right,
was paintingthe Sixteenth Chapel,that he said,
"Hey, guys, you know,I did pretty goodon the first 15 chapels,
"but why don't you help medesign this one?
"And maybeyou could help me...Give me a brush
"and you guys cangrab brushes, and we can allmake a great chapel." Uh-uh.
No, he didn't.And you wanna knowwhat the results were?
A masterpiece.
Okay. It's the Sistine Chapel,not the Sixteenth,
and I bet when Michelangeloasked for 12 brushes,they didn't bring him three.
Yeah. Okay, all the talkingis really startingto drain me,
and now I'm gonna have towatch the highlights laterto see what I missed here.
Honey, look, Gary, just...Down time's important.
Gary, please justtake a shower, okay?Down time's important.
'Cause this is whatI don't want to have happen.
I don't want the doorbellto ring. I'm then forcedto answer the door,
entertain people,and I'm still cooking dinner.
Yeah.Okay?
You're absolutely right.Let's do that. The secondthat this inning's over...
Gary.There's one out all ready.
They're gonna be herein 20 minutes.
Baby, have you ever seena shower of mine takemore than four minutes?
Yes, I have. Come on.
(DOORBELL RINGING)Oh, great!
They're here. Okay.Table's not set.Dinner's not ready.
Would you pleasejust let my parents in?
I gotta jump in the shower.What?
(DOORBELL RINGING)I gotta go.
Gary. Gary.
(DOORBELL RINGING)
GARY: Well, seeing howour families haven'thad many opportunities
to get to know one another,we figured, what better waythan to break some bread?
So, everyone,thank you for comingand enjoy the meal.
ALL: Cheers.Cheers, honey.
Mrs. Grobowski.Nice to meet you.Thank you.
DENNIS: Cheer with the sons.GARY: Sweetheart,cheers to you.
Darling, I see that you putthose Feng Shui books
that I sent to youto good use.
This place isso well balanced.Thanks, Mom.
Yeah, the energy in this placeis just amazing.
WENDY: Yes.
Well, the energy in the condomight be a little more amazing
if we had a pool table.
Gary, we've alreadydiscussed that.
We're gonna get a pool tablewhen we get a bigger place.
The place is plenty big now,if you wanted a pool tablebecause...
Gary.Yeah. You could takethe dining room table,
go ahead and move herin the living room.
BROOKE: Really?GARY: Plenty of room.
And put a dining room tablein the living room? Okay.
How do you...I mean, what do you dowith a dining room table?
Eat on it.We'd have no furniturein the living...
Where's the furniture go?All I'm saying is,
it would be niceto be able to shoot some pool.
Well, this isn't a dorm.Look, baby,I completely understand.
There's halls and stuff.I mean, you can go...
We will waitand get a pool tablewhen we have a bigger place.
Thank you.
The food is outstanding.It is delicious food.
DENNIS: It's outstanding.
LUPUS:Yeah, it really is nice.Okay, everybody.
Time for the joke of the day.Knock, knock.Dad. Dad, come on.
Who's there?Norma Lee.
Norma Lee, who?
Normally, I don't go aroundknocking on doors,
but would you like to buyan encyclopedia?LUPUS: I got a joke.I got a joke.
(ALL CHUCKLING)How's it going?I got a joke for you.
What do you get when you crossa gay Eskimo and a black guy?
All right, look,I think we've had enoughwith the jokes for tonight.
Thank you, though.Let's just talkwith each other.
All right.
I saw that Three Brothersarticle in the Trib this week.
Sounds like you guys are upto some pretty exciting stuff.
Basically, our big goal is totry to take Chicago tourismby air, land and sea.
We're still in the groundphase with the buses.
But as soon as we getour infantry established,
then we'll take itto the squids.Yeah.
Boats. Boats.Oh, boats.
As soon as we controlthe waterway, then we'llbring in air supports
and then we'll pretty muchcontrol everything.
You know, Dennis,
the way your face lights upwhen you describeyour ambitions,
it's really inspiring.
Oh, thanks.Because I understand
how you feel that passion.
RICHARD: And sharing itwith other people, I thinkthat's what life's about.
I don't feel that aboutboats and squibs... Squids?
ALL: Squids.Sorry.
CAROL: Yeah.But I do feel itabout singing.
With my a cappella group,The Tone Rangers.
Although it's notas aggressive as your dream,
it's reallymore of a brotherhood.It's like a musical team.
It's like a symphony of guys.Guy symphony.
And it's very hardto describe the true magic
of a group of guyssinging in perfect harmony.
It's transcendent.
But it's still very real.
I guess the best wayto put it in words is just...
(SINGING SINGLE NOTE)
Even that doesn't do it.
That doesn't do itbecause that's justone person.
And what I'm talking about isthe pulse of the collective.
Oh, heck. Let me justshow you how it's done.
Dad, how abouta little percussion?
RICHARD: Tap-tap-tappy.Tap-tap-tappy.
And, Mom, high-hat.
(HISSING)
RICHARD: Good, Mom.Excellent. And Gary!
(RHYTHMICALLY)On the kick drum! Come, come!On the kick drum! Come, come!
That's Gary! Come, comewith the kick drum. Come!
Come, come with the kick drum.Gary, on the kick drum.Come, come.
That's Gary on the kick drum.Go! And Gary. In the house.
Come, come.I'm not with you.
Come, come.With the kick drum.Come, come.
I'm just not reallythe kick drum kind of guy.
I'd rather be just a listenerand enjoy all the bangingthat he's doing and the...
You know, Gary,that's your prerogative.That's your right, to listen.
Meantime, I've gotta talkto Brooke about something.
It's called the bass line.Excuse me.Okay.
(PITCH PIPE PLAYING)
(HUMMING RHYTHMICALLY)
(SCATTING)
(HISSING)
Good, Carol.
Good, Brooke.
(ALL SINGING)
RICHARD: Yes, Dennis.
(WHISPERING) Be nice.RICHARD: Totally awesome.
(MIMICKING METALLIC CLANGING)
Move yourself
You always live your life
Never thinking of the future
Prove yourself
You are the move you make
Take your chanceswin or loser
See yourself
You're every step you take
You and youand that's the only way
ShakeWENDY: Shake!
Shake yourself
You're every move you make
So the story goes
CAROL: Thank you so much.
BROOKE: Okay, bye.WENDY: Thank you so much.
CAROL: It was greatto see you.Okay. Come on.
Have a good night.It was really nice, Gary.
Nice to see you. You, too.Good to see you guys.
Thanks, Brookie.Oh, honey.Thank you, sweetie.
You're stillmy favorite singer.Stop it.
Love you, sis.And I'd love for youto come to a live performance
of The Tone Rangerssinging live. That'ssomething you'd really enjoy.
It was good seeing you.Okay.
Thank you.All right.
Bye, darling.Thank you for such a...Okay. Okay, Mom.
We'll see you soon.Bye, dear. Thanks, darling.
See you later.Okay, buddy.
Oh, now, are you surethat we can't help youclean up?
No, no. I think we'regonna be great. We'II...Yes?
So nice of you to offer,but we got it. Thank you.
Oh, it was such fun.Great.
I love you.Great to see you.
Good night, sweetie.Thank you so much.
I appreciate it.Thank you so much.
All right, guys.WENDY: Bye-bye.
Bye-bye.Thanks for coming.
Love you, too.
MAN ON TV: Are you blind?
(HORN TOOTING)
Oh, no, no! My demos!
(MAN ON TV SCREAMING)
Well, I'm gonnago do the dishes.Cool.
It'd be nice if you helped me.Damn it.
MAN: Way to go!
No problem. I'll get thema little bit later.
I'm just gonnahit the streets herefor a little bit.
Gary, come on,I don't want to do them later.
Let's just do them now.It'll take 15 minutes.
Honey, I am so exhausted.I just honestly wantto relax for a little bit.
If I could just sit here,let my food digest,
and just try to enjoythe quiet for a little bit.
Get some! Get some! Get some!That's what happens.
And we will...You know, we can cleanthe dishes tomorrow.
Gary, you know I don't likewaking up to a dirty kitchen.
Who cares?I care! All right? I care!
I busted my ass all daycleaning this houseand then cooking that meal.
And I worked today.It would be niceif you said thank you
and helped me with the dishes.
Fine. I'll help youdo the damn dishes.Oh, come on. You know what?
No. See?That's not what I want.
You just said that you want meto help you do the dishes.
I want you to wantto do the dishes.Why would I want to do dishes?
Why?See, that's my whole point.
Let me see if I'mfollowing this, okay? Are youtelling me that you're upset
because I don't havea strong desireto clean dishes?
No. I'm upset becauseyou don't have a strong desireto offer to do the dishes.
I just did.After I asked you!
Jesus, Brooke,you're acting crazy again.Don't you call me crazy.I am not crazy.
I didn't call you crazy.You just did.
I didn't call you...No, I didn't.
I said you're acting crazy.You know what, Gary?
I asked you to doone thing today,one very simple thing,
to bring me 12 lemonsand you brought me three.
God damn it. If I knewthat it was gonna bethis much trouble,
I would have brought home24 lemons. Even 100 lemons.
You know what I wish?I wish everyone that wasat that goddamn table
had their own little privatebag of lemons.
Honest to God!Gary, it's notabout the lemons.
Well, that's allyou're talking about.
I'm just sayingit'd be nice if you didthings that I asked.
It would be even nicerif you did things withoutme having to ask you!
Well, I do seem to rememberdoing something for youthis morning
without you asking.
Gary, come on.What? I'm serious. Come here.
You know what? I'm serious.I really am.I am, too.
Come on.You knew I was working todayand I made that meal.
And you could have thoughtto yourself, you know,you could have said,
"Yeah, I think I'm gonnaget Brooke some flowers."
You saidon our very first datethat you don't like flowers,
that they're a waste of money.
Every girl likes flowers,Gary.
You said that youdon't like flowers.
I'm supposedto take that to meanthat you do like flowers?
No. This is not about...You're not...God, you're not getting it.
You're not getting this,Gary, okay?It's not about the lemons.
It's not about the flowers.It's not about the dishes.
It's just about...How many times do I have todrop hints about the ballet?
You know I can't stand...Brooke, come here.
We've talked aboutthe damn ballet.I hate the goddamn ballet!
You got a bunch of dudesin tights flopping aroundfor three hours.
It's like a medievaltechno show. It's a nightmare.
I sit there in a sweat.The whole thing, I do,
wondering when the hell'sthe goddamn nightmaregonna end.
Go to a damn ballet.It's not about youloving the ballet, Gary.
It's about theperson that you loveloves the ballet
and you wanting to spend timewith that person.
Not when they'reat the ballet.
Okay. Forget the ballet!Forget the ballet!I will.
We don't go anywhere together.
We just wentto Ann Arbor together.To Ann Arbor.
To theMichigan-Notre Dame game.
You think screaming,drunk kids and leprechaunsdoing backflips, that's fun.
That's fun for me.Come on, man.I did that for you.
What do you...How do you show up for me?
I'm up on the busevery goddamn day for you!
Come on. You...I'm busting my ass
to be the best tour guidein the damn city,
so I can make enough moneyto support both of us
and hopefully you won'thave to work one day.
I want to work.All I ask, Brooke,
is that you show a little bitof appreciation.
That I just get 20 minutesto relax when I come home,
instead of being attackedwith questions and naggedthe whole damn time.
You think that I nag you?That's all you do!
All you do is nag me!
"The bathroom's a mess.""Your belt doesn't match."
"Hey, Gary, you shouldprobably go work out."
Nothing I ever dois ever good enough!
I just want to be leftthe hell alone!
Really? Is thatwhat you want, Gary?
Is that what you want?Yeah.
That's what you want?Yeah.
Fine. Great.Do whatever the hell you want.
You leave your socksall over this house,dress like a pig,
play your stupid-assvideo game.I don't care, I'm done.
What?I'm done!I don't deserve this.
I really do not deserve this.I deserve somebodywho gives a shit.
I'm not spending one moresecond of this lifewith some inconsiderate prick!
You're a prick!
(DOOR SLAMMING)
(DOOR SHUTS)
Addie, it just becameso clear tonight
how much he takes mefor granted.
What happened?BROOKE:Just the same old shit.
I asked him to do one thingand he didn't do it.
Then he complainedthat he had to do anything,
and I just felt likeI had no choice.
No, sweetie,you did have a choice, okay?
And it sounds like youmade the right one.You respected yourself.
But it's just not what I want.I don't want to break upwith him.
I don't. I just want himto say thank you. I want himto want to do the dishes.
I just want him to wantto take me to the ballet.
I want him to get me12 lemons! You know...
I just want him to careenough about this relationshipto want to work on it.
Okay, you know what?I'm putting on my shoes
and I'm gonna be therein 15 minutes.No, Ad. Don't.
Please, I really don'twant to see anybody.I really don't.
But, look, I'm worriedabout you, okay?
And I can hear you in therebanging around your dishes.
And I don't want yougetting out your Cloroxand your rubber gloves,
and taking this outon the kitchen.Look, look, look.
Okay. Tonight just...It just got a littleout of hand,
and hopefullyhe's just gonna realize
that he's got some changesto make and he's gonna...
He's gonna come homeand apologize.
Okay?That's what's gonna happen.
GARY: I feel like, I don't...You know, like, you dresshowever you want to dress.
You know,do whatever you want to do.
I'm done withthe relationship.Whatever.
So, it's just kind of,"You're donewith the relationship?"
Well, you're obviouslyhurt about it.
She got to you. You're hurt.I'm not.
It's nothing to be ashamed of.She hurt you.
Will you look at me?I'm not heartbroken.
I'm a little shocked.I'm a little surprised.
Gary, you're devastated.Now, what's the nameof the guy she's doing?
I'm gonna solve your problem.What's his name?
What are you talking about?Have you checked her e-mail?
I don't check e-mails.I don't...
You can get a programthat records keystrokes.
It costs, like, 20 bucks.Very easy to use. Okay?
You get a password, you checkher e-mail. You find outeverything about her.
That's how I found outabout the Puerto Rican
that Stacy wasrunning around with.Okay.
You are readinga little too muchinto this situation.
There is no one she'srunning around with, okay?
We had a fightover the groceriesI brought home.
You're probably right.She's probably notsleeping with anybody.
No. Not what it's about.Okay.
Maybe she's withanother guy, maybe not.She's not.
I don't know.I'm not Columbo. Okay?
But what we do knowis that she doesn't wantto be with you anymore.
I mean, I hate to be shittyabout it, and so cut and dry,but let's face it.
She says she doesn'twant to be with you,and I believe her.
Now, we gotta figure it out.And you're gonnaneed a place to go
and lick your woundswhile you get your headright over this thing.
I don't need a place to goand lick my wounds.
You're gonna stay with me.
I'm not gonna hear it.Look it...
I'm not movingout of the place.Oh, you're not moving out.
No. I put money in the place.I put half my moneyin the place.
You're obviously notthe one calling the shotsin this case.
Yeah, but I own the place.
With her.Yeah.
But it's not up to herwho gets to keepthe goddamn place.
If you find outwho she's sleeping with,maybe we could leverage it.
I want you to listen to me.You listen to me.
I'm gonna leave you a key.I don't need a key.
Why?'Cause she's gonna put...
She's gonna move outof the place, Johnny.
Did she sayshe was moving out?She will.She's gonna move out.
Oh, she's...I'm gonna keep the place.
I'm not movingout of the place.
I'll leave you a key.
(DOOR OPENING)
(DOOR SHUTTING)
(TOOL WHIRRING)
Hey, how's it going?LUPUS: I almost got it.
Yeah.You know, I was thinking.
You know what you should do,
is you should find somebodywho looks like Brooke,
but even hotter and, you know,bang the shit out of her.
What the hell'swrong with you?What?
Logs.Just fix the damn engine.
I am fixingthe goddamn engine.I need your tour logs.
I'm off the clock, okay?
Well, I cannotfile the quarterliesuntil I have your log.
I'm going througha little bit of alife change here, Dennis.
I would really appreciatea little bit of sensitivity,please.
CHRISTOPHER: I know they'reboth French, but that hasnothing to do with it.
Because Manet was earlierand... No. Monet and Manetare very different things.
I'm sorry, I beg to differ.
Excuse me, sir, can I have hercall you back personally?
Yes. Okay, thank you.Sorry. Brooke?
I am so sorry.What?
Come here.
Oh, honey, your mom calledand told me everything.
Oh, Jesus.
Good morning, Marilyn.
Morning.I'll go water the plants.
I understandyou had a long night.Tell me everything.
BROOKE: "Everything."I couldn't possibly...
Then don't.My time is pressing.
What I want is for youto take the restof the day off.
Oh, no.No, that's not necessary.
Who am I?
Marilyn Dean.And where are we?
The Marilyn Dean Gallery.And of whom is that portrait?
That is Marilyn Dean.Yeah.
You know, your personal lifeis your personal life.
But you look like shit.And when you look like shit,
Marilyn Dean looks like shit,and now it is my business.
And when it comes to mybusiness, I don't likeanything that's distracting.
So, I want you to takethe rest of the day offto be sad
and then come backto work tomorrow readyto take care of business.
Got it?
(ELEVATOR BELL DINGS)
(ROCK MUSIC BLARING)
(POOL BALLS CLACKING)
Oh, hey, Brooke. How are you?
What the hell are you doing?
Well, my whole life,I always wanted my own placewith my own pool table.
I finally got my own place,
but you would not allow meto have a pool table.
I just kind of figuredI'd rectify that today.And it does feel good.
I'm gonna go aheadand put the four ballin the corner pocket.
Nice.
I'm sorry, can I...A little room for theshooter, please?
It's hard to shootwith someone standing...Thank you.
(POOL BALLS CLACKING)
Wow.
Well, I guess he feelsthreatened that you broke upwith him and he's acting out.
Okay, look, Brooke,men are like children.You know? And they...
(WHISPERING) Sweetie, it's afigure of speech. It's Brooke.And I love you so much.
And you're my manand you know that.You're amazing. I love you.
Listen, and they're gonnatest boundaries to seewhat they can get away with.
I think there's three thingsthat Gary needs to know.
One, this type of behavioris not unnoticed.Two, it's not acceptable.
And three, you know,you're definitely not gonnatolerate it. Right?
Yes.
And Brooke, remember,we're always owningour actions, right?
And we're alwayshealthy with it, yes?
Yes.
I don't wanna finish the game.I got showings, okay?
I gotta buy the cookie spray.I gotta clean up the dog.
(YOU OUGHTA KNOW PLAYING)
And now I'm really leaving'cause I don't wantto hear that. Okay?
Thank you for the pool.Thank you for the snacks.
I'm going to get a cab.I'll split it with you.
What are you, 12?Brooke, that is not healthy.
I'm trying to make a point.And what is that point?
My point's your point.Your three points.
That it's not unnoticed,that it was not acceptable,
and that it would definitelynot be tolerated.
Not exactly what I meant.
Unbelievable.
I knew it!Hey, gang.
Found my shirt on the floor.Thanks for laying it out.
Gary, are you herefor couples bowling?Yeah.
Well, don't you thinkyou and I should discusssomething first?
Like what? How your47 average is killing us?
Okay. Great. No.
Gary, this is couples bowling.And since you and Iare no longer a couple,
because you have chosen
not to participateconstructivelyin our relationship,
we're now singles.
So, there's not roomfor two singles on the team.
Why do you look confused?
I don't have any ideawhat's happening.I've come to play on the team.
Look, Gary, I just don't thinkit's a good idea
for you and I to be aroundeach other any morethan we have to right now.
I completely agree.Maybe you should goplay some pinball.
No, I think you should leave.Okay.
Brooke, when a man makesa commitment to a team,he honors that commitment.
He doesn't let emotionsor personal issuesget in the way of victory.
And I've made a commitmentto this team.
They don't want you hereeither, Gary.Yeah. Sure, they don't.
They don't.They're my friends.
But you're nota strong bowler.That's not the point.
You know what? Let's just...Why don't we let them decide?
Gary, don't. No.Don't involve them, okay?That's unnecessary.
What's wrong, Castro?Castro?
Well, Castro doesn'tlet people vote as a team.
Okay. Ask them.Thank you.
Okay, everyone.Team vote here.
By a show of hands,just put it up when youmake a decision,
who here agrees with Brookeand thinks I should leavethe bowling team?
Shocker.
Band of Brothers.You should rent it sometime.
Good luck, everyone.Riding Miss Gutter Ballto the finals.
Hey, Gary.Yeah.
I'm gonna needyour shirt back.What?
Well, we're gonna have toreplace you, and you knowwe get docked 10 pins
if everyone's not in matchingPin Shakers uniforms.
My shirt says "Gary" on it.Granted.
But actually,we know a guy named Gary.
And he's not as tall as you,but he's a pretty good bowler.
I'm gonna have to requestthat I have my wrist guardback then.
I'm sorry. That's mine.
Just give methe goddamn wrist guard,please. Thank you.
I hope your wrist snaps.
Wow. Okay? You see that?You know what I mean?
Yeah. That was awesome.
You just had yourex-boyfriend, who you wishyou were still dating,
voted off the bowling team.
Well, I had to do thatto get him rightwhere I want him.
Where's that?Shirtless in the parking lot?
Addie,you're not getting this.
Gary loves this bowling team.He's hurt right now.
He's feeling pretty bad.
He's gonna go out thereand he's gonna get drunk.
He's gonna makea complete fool of himself.
And he will be sitting therefeeling pretty Ionely
and pretty pathetic,and then it's justgonna hit him.
What's gonna hit him?
That not only is heout a girlfriend,
but his life is justfalling apart piece by piece
and maybe that lifewas pretty great.
And maybe I was the gluethat was holding it alltogether.
And if he wantsthat life back,
he's gonna have no choicebut to change.
(MUSIC PLAYING)
How about this, huh?I feel likewe just found hell.
When did you startcoming to knobby jointslike this?
I might be the greatestyou've ever seen, pal.
I'm conquering new frontiers.Hello, babe.
Yeah, you've got to put upwith the bad musicand the $15 drinks,
but this place is stackedwith top-shelf, young,dumb ass.
All you gotta do is justseparate the weaker onesfrom the herd.
Come on,I'll get you into the VIP.
Can I get a couple drinksfrom you?Okay, L.G.
Lupus, I got to be totally...I got to be honest with you.
I'm not feeling it here.
You're gonna like it in here.You're gonna love it.
I don't like it out here.Look, listen to me,will you, please?
How you doing, Buzz?
While you wereon the inside locked upfor the past two years,
the game has changed.
(WOMEN CHEERING)
Do you rememberwhen you were an outdoor cat
and you used to have to huntand kill for your food?
Well, you've becomean indoor cat.
You've been getting your milkbrought to you
in a silver bowl,and guess what?
Now, you've beentossed back outside
and the alley has changed.For example,your MTV generation,
your technology,your text message,your TiVo. You name it.
People want theirinformation faster.
People e-mail each otherbecause they want toexchange information, Gar.
They don't want to connect,they want results.
Okay.You gotta get tothe message quicker.
Now, I want you to watch.It's real simple. Okay?
How you doing, ladies?
Now, here's what I'd liketo do to you.
First, I'd like toget you naked.
And then I'm gonna takesome Saran Wrap
and I'm gonna wrap youup in it, head to toe.
Then I'm gonnacut out two holes.
One for your mouth,so you can breathe,obviously.
And the other one...Asshole.
It could be a gorgeousevening for us, babe.
The pink is gorgeous.Jesus, God.
Come here.Lupus, listen to me.I want you to listen to me.
There are our drinks.You want your drink?
No, I'm fine.Thank you.The L.G. thanks you.
Will you listen to me,please? You're my brotherand I love you very much,
and maybe you doget laid tonight,but maybe you get arrested.
Arrested for what, babe?Being awesome?
Come on, babe, listen.You want to tell your jokes,tell your jokes.
But sooner or lateryou're gonna get hungryand you're gonna wanna eat.
And jokes mightmake you feel better,but they don't get you fed.
I'm gonna go take a lap.
(DOOR OPENING)
(DOOR SHUTTING)
What are you doing?I'm sketching.
And where are you sketching?
In the living room.No, in my bedroom.
And I didn't say anythingto you, Brooke,
when you so arrogantlyclaimed the bedwithout asking me,
but you can't just waltzinto my room and turn itinto a damn art fair.
Gary, I've only taken upa little bit of space, so...
I don't care if you onlytook an inch.
There might not bea door here, but thisis my domain. Okay?
I don't go into your bedroomand set up a goddamn sawhorse.
Well, then what the hellis that pool tabledoing in the dining room?
Because that's a common area.And that's where this belongs.
Not in my room.Hey, what are you doing?
It belongs in anothercommon area.Gary.
People want to come homeand they want to relaxin their room.
Gary, it is 2:00in the morning!
Don't you drop my things.I don't knowwhat to tell you, kid.
This is how I amwhen I'm single.
My hours start to getpretty strange.
Might be time for youto think about moving out.
Why would I...No, I'm not moving anywhere.
Gary, just pleaseturn the volume down.
Yeah, but I don't tell youwhat the hell to doin your room.
You can doodle. You can dance.
You can bakea goddamn gingerbread house.
I don't give a shit.
But in my room,I want to relaxand watch my highlights
in complete surround-soundexperience.
What the hell are you doing?You're not even gonnawatch it!
Don't tell me what I amor aren't not doing.
Oh, what you are not,not doing?
Go learn some English.Oh, I'm sorry.
I didn't have a grandfatheron the board ofsome fancy college.
Key word being "was."Did he touch the Filipinoexchange student?
Did he not touchthe exchange student?
I don't know, Brooke.I wasn't there.Okay.
No, don't startwith the family stuff.
Like your family's so perfect?Your brother's a pervert!
Don't talk to me aboutthe sexual habitsof family members.
What about your sister?
My sister'sbeen through a lot.Of dick.
There are some problems, Gary,but can we pleasejust leave it...
Problems? She slept withthe entire Arizona Cardinalsoffensive line.
That's not problems.That's she's the problem!
She was on vacation!She was on vacation.
Don't even get me started,by the way, on your brother.
If I have to hearthat guy singjust one more time,
I'd hang myselfwith wax dental floss.
Could the guy justcome out of the closet,please?
Richard is not gay.
Okay, lassie,I want you to listen to meand listen good.
I'm not sayinghe won't get married.
I'm not sayinghe won't even have kids.
But then one dayhis wife will come home,
and then she'll find himwith a guy named Majulio,
wearing leather helmetsand clubbing each otherto Yanni's greatest hits.
Yeah. Right. Whatever.You're an infant.
Yeah, I'm an infant.
Go enjoy your room, Brooke,'cause I'm gonna enjoy mine!
Okay.You know what?
I might enjoysome pay-per-viewoptions tonight.
It's gonna be a long one,sweetheart,
and I got nothing to do ma�anabut sleep in.
(DOOR SLAMMING)
(BOOGIE NIGHTS PLAYING)
(SINGING) Boogie nightsAin't no doubtwe are here to party
What are you doing?
Boogie nightsCome on now,got to get it started
Ricky, you andthe Get Along Gang leave
or I'm gonnathrow you out of herepersonally, you understand?
Actually, Gary,this is Brooke's bedroom.
So, technically,you don't havejurisdiction here,
but I think it'd be really funif you sang with us.
Come on, Gary.I think you'll like it.
You got 10 secondsto get out of here
or I'm gonna breakyour damn magic whistle.
You understandwhat I'm saying to you?
Move this groupout of my house, now!
(EXCLAIMING)
(GRUNTING)
(ALL SINGING)
Gary, you can't takea pitch pipeout of a guy's hand
when he's in the middleof a very funky groove.
You can get hurtdoing something like that.
I'm tapping out,I'm tapping out!
Here we go. From the bridge.
(SINGING) Party nightGet on downwith the sound of the music
Boogie nightsDo it, do it
What kind of bullshit movewas that?
I'm sorry. What?What happened?Oh, don't be coy with me.
You sent that animal over hereto attack me when I washung over and weak.
Oh, no. Look, all I knowis The Tone Rangers,
they needed someplaceto rehearse,
so I very clearlytold Richard,"Stay in my room,"
which you explained to mewas my space to dowith what I want.
Is that howyou want to play it?'Cause I'll play it like that.
I'll play it likeLionel Richie.
All night long, lady.Oh, yeah.
I'll call some guysfrom my neck of the woods.
And we're not talking, Brooke,
about a couple of queenswho know a few grapples.
We're talking about Polacksthat don't havea goddamn future.
Right.That's right!
We can make shitreal uncomfortablearound here,
and that's whatwe're gonna do.
Please. Come on.You know what?
You're just embarrassedbecause Richardkicked your ass.
Richard did not kick my ass.
What Richard did was attack mewhen I was half asleep.
Really?Is that how you see it?
There's a really big gapbetween gettingyour ass kicked
and havinga dancing, singing spritefool you with trickery
and then strike your throatbefore you know thatyou're even in a fight.
And I wouldn't expectsomeone like youto understand that,
because all you ever dois make moves fromup in your ivy tower.
Wow. You have officiallygone off the reservation.
I'm an adult.I talk through shit.He ran out of ideas.
God. Listen, by the way,there's messageson the voice mail
regarding game night,which is obviouslynot gonna happen,
so you might want tocall people and tell themthat it's canceled.
Why would I cancel game night?Well, I mean...
If it's our turn to host game,I'm gonna hostgoddamn game night.
You want to host game night?I'm fine, Brooke.
I don't have any strangenessover what happened here today.
Okay.
If there's anyonethat should feel weirdabout seeing people,
that's you, Tonya Harding.Me? I'm gonna honormy commitments.
Great.Great.
Fine.Fine.
Let's do that.Let's do that.
Let's honor the commitment.
(WATER RUNNING)
Hey, there's no food in there!BROOKE: So?
Well, people are gonnabe here in an hour.What are they supposed to eat?
You're a big boy.Figure it out.
Oh, great.Well, that's what we got.
We have only tap waterbecause, you know,Gary didn't shop.
BROOKE: And we don't haveany ice either 'causehe didn't fill the trays.
That's trash. It's your shot.What is your name again?
Diane.Diane.
GARY: Did you call?JOHNNY O: I called the five.
Well, yeah,but you didn't callthe second ball,
so that's trash,so it's your shot.
GARY: You got to playby the rules. It's your shot.
Hi.Hi.
Andrew.BROOKE: Oh, hi.
Whoa, whoa, whoa!Hey, hey, hey!
These two Benedict Arnoldsaren't welcome in my condo.
Who sent an invite to them?I'm sorry.
These are very loyal friendsand they are always welcomein my condo.
Oh, really? Why don't wetake it to a vote and seewho has the numbers this time?
GARY: All right.Show of hands here.
Who thinks that these twotraitors should leave andnot be a part of game night?
And maybe take their shirtsoff when they leave.
Raise your hand.I know I feel that way.Who else?
GARY: Come on, Johnny O,put your hand up, please.
Come on. Thank you.You, Miss? New girl.
Who's the girl?What's her name?What's her name?
The girl you're with.What's her name?Her name's Diane.
Oh, I'm sorry.You might want to go aheadand touch some sky.
Thank you. Come on,Riggleman, please?What are you doing?
No. We need the eightto count towardsa running tally.
You know that. Come on.
Show her whose sidethat you're on.Put your hand in the air.
You know whose side I'm on.You know we need eight,though. Come on.
Put your hand down.
Please don't touchmy Ruffles.
GARY: Put that one back.Those are my Ruffles.
Don't eat them, please.Thank you.
Oh, Gary.They're mine.
Come on.Here we go. All right.
RIGGLEMAN: Eyes front. Ready?Hold on. Get thetimer going, please.
Ready?GARY: Now I gotta do it. Go.
ANDREW: Okay.It's a brick.
ADDIE: Square. Square.Box. Box.
Corner. Corner.A dot in the corner.
A house.Home plate!
JEN: Football! Baseball!Sports. A house.ADDIE: A triangle.It's algebra.
Okay, it's a house.ADDIE: It's a house.
JEN: It's a house.ANDREW: Two words.
JEN: Banana?ADDIE: Chimney,chimney, chimney!
A fruit. House. Fruit.
Oh, restaurant. Or...
ANDREW: No, chimney, chimney.ADDIE: Smoke...
JEN: Oh, a house call.House call!
(TIMER RINGING)Oh! House call!
Yeah, well, I thoughtit was a house call.
Like a hotel, then it hit meit was a house.ADDIE: Yeah!
You're terrific.Absolutely terrific.
All right, beat that.
Okay, guys, listen.The next one wins, okay?
So let's stay focused.Let's stay calm.
We can do this. High fives.Let's go. Come on. Let's go.
Let's get a mind-meld.Let's try and get a mind-meld,okay?
GARY: Here we go.Let's go. Mind-meld.I heard you!
Don't over-think it.Mind meld.ANDREW: Ready?
I heard you!Well, just keep it simple.
Shush.
Ready? Wait. Go!Here we go!We're mind-melding.
Draw faster.It doesn't haveto be beautiful,
just has to besomething we can get.Shoe, shoe...
Shoe! Shoe, shoe, shoe.
Shoeless Joe Jackson.Draw something different.No one's getting it.
Shoe. What, is thata smaller shoe?JOHNNY O: Baby shoe.
Smaller shoe. Baby shoes.JOHNNY O: Shoes.
Baby shoes.Smaller shoe. Gumshoe.
GARY: Smaller shoes.DIANE: Gumshoe? Gumshoe?
Running Olympics.JOHNNY O: Inside the shoe.
Inside a shoe. A bubble...JOHNNY O: Lining.
Stop pointing at the shoe.We're not...No one's guessing shoe.
Stop pointing at the shoeand draw something different.
(TIMER RINGING)Draw something different.You...
Goddamn it!No one's guessing shoe!
You drew a big shoe,then a small shoe,and no one got it.
You gotta draw somethingdifferent. Everyone said"shoe" seven times.
It's a sock, asshole.
You call yourself an artist?Yes!
A three-year-old witha box of crayons coulddo a better job than this.
I'm sorry, I don't havethe great talent of standingon top of a big red bus
and pointing out architecturethat other great menhave built!
I'm the one who shouldbe sorry, Brooke.
I shouldn't sit hereand pick on your art.No.
Because you gotthe nuts part down,Picasso.
GARY: All you haveto do iscut off your frigging ear.
BROOKE: That's Van Gogh,you idiot!
And your insultsare much more effectivewhen they're accurate.
Don't talk to me aboutbeing goddamn accurate!
I can talk to youabout anything that I want.
'Cause you couldn't evendraw a sock.
You don't do anything right!You're a lazy...
Everyone said,"Shoe, shoe, shoe!"
At first,I figured that the splitwas just something temporary,
something that you twowould work out and get past,
but after tonightI think it's pretty clear
that you two genuinelydo not want toget back together.
There's not a shot in hell.Gary.
I'm just...I got you.
As your friendand as your realtor,
I'm not gonnaleave here tonight
until we decidewhat to do about this condo,
because this living situationis obviously not working out.
Gary?
Well, the only logical thingthat I can think of
is for her to move outof the condo,
and then to pay me somesort of a penaltyas compensation for
the labor that I didall around the condo.What? What?
What? Pay you compensationfor your labor?
We fixed this place uptogether.Are you nuts?
Stop calling me nuts,I swear to God.I fixed the...
You went around with a sponge,
and you went in the bathroomand you dotted foofy shit.
That's what you're sayingthat I did?GARY: There's no...
BROOKE: That was...That's called aesthetics.
It warmed this place upso it didn't look like
an army barracks,which it was about to.
I'll tell you whatit's called in his language,depreciated.
That's what it's called.You don't even knowwhat that means.
Unless the next buyerhappens to have your sameZulu-voodoo-land taste.
All right.Let me tell yousomething else.
It's gonna cost moneyto cover up the holesin the wall.
The holes that you drilledin the wall there to hang upwhatever that thing is called.
Oh, please. Gary.
GARY: You're gonna haveto cost money to fix that.
What I did, Brooke,has concrete valueto the condo.
I added concrete...Well, let's just go on record.
We're dealing with facts here.I did the tilingin the bathroom.
Have you seen...I did the new track lighting.
That tile is theshittiest tile job.GARY: I did the plumbing!
The plumbing!That's realty terms.
Okay. Let's talkabout your plumbing.This is his plumbing.
We have two temperaturesin our bathroom.
We get either scalding hotor we get frostbite.
That's it. That's all we get.It's my problem
that she doesn't know howto pace a shower?
GARY: Now all of a suddenthat's my fault.
I get a minuteto take a shower.
One minute?BROOKE: One minute of warmth?
Oh, Jesus. One minute.That's it. That's correct.
Thank God you're notin charge of keeping all theclocks in Chicago on time.
This is basic logic.You are out of your mind.You have lost it.
Let me explain this to youin plain chapter and verse.
Cheese and rice,you guys are gonna killeach other. Now, let's just...
Realistically speaking,neither one of you
can afford this mortgageon your own, okay?
And that's a shame,because this building willcontinue to increase in value.
I get nothing butphone calls about it,all right?
Waiting for a unit to open up.
So, as your realtor,the last thing I would suggestis selling.
But as your friend,I just, I don't seeany other solution.
You take your halves,you go your separate ways,
and you get onwith your lives.
I know that selling is notthe easiest thing, butI do think that it's the best.
And to be honest,this is a situation
where I would just as soonnot take a commission.
That's great. Thank you.That's great.Thank you for that.
I wish I didn't have to,you know,
but company policy saysI cannot waive that.
But I was just...You know, I'm sayingin theory, you know.
In this situation,'cause we're friends,I wish I could waive it.
No can do, though.
As soon as you can,I would love to geta set of keys from you guys.
You just drop them off.Okay. Great. There they are.
I'll be bringing bypeople all week.
You won't even know I'm here.The good news is,should move quickly.
All right.
Okay to leave you twoalone now?
Got to get back to Jen.Very excited aboutthe win tonight.
Okay.
(DOOR OPENING)
(DOOR CLOSING)
BROOKE: Addie,if the condo sells,I think I'm gonna lose him.
ADDIE ON PHONE:Yeah, but game nightwas so light and fun,
I'm really surprisedto be hearing this.
Okay. You know what?That's not constructive.Really.
I just... Yeah, I needa new plan, Addie. I don't...
(SNICKERING)
I'm just kidding. It's me.
I'm gonna have tocall you back.
Whenever one of my friendsis down, we all go on,like, happy patrol.
I was actually havinga very serious conversation.
(SINGING)Christopher, do not sing.
(SINGING) If you're happyand you know itClap your hands
If you're happyand you know itClap your hands
If you're happyand you know itYou're going to smile to...
(DOOR SLAMS)
Pack up your shit and go home.
Okay. You know what?This is not his fault.
He was just really tryingto cheer me up and it...
Did I or did I not give youthe day off to be sad?
Yes. But I...Well, today's not that day,
and unfortunately for you,I can't afford to look weak.
No, please.
You have warned meso many timesand you have yet to fire me.
I think you and I both knowthat to find and trainsomebody new,
it's gonna cost you time,and it's gonna cost you money,
and I don't think you wantto spend either one of those.
Now, look, I'm just gonnatake a wild guess here,
but you don't becomeMarilyn Dean
without knowinghow to handle men.
Okay? Now, just listento my problem,
tell me how to fix it,and then we'll allgo back to work.
Okay. What is this problemso severe
that has caused you toblaspheme in the synagogueof Marilyn Dean?
Well, it's Gary.I broke up with him
in hopes that losing mewould make himwant to change,
and that's, you know...
And I've just ended uppushing him, you know,farther and farther away.
That's it?Yeah.
Honey, this is notsurrealism or cubism,it's paint-by-numbers.
Go see Mischa,my personal waxer at the spa.
Ask her for the Telly Savalas.
The Telly Savalas.
Compliments of M. Dean.
Then go show Garyyour immaculate canvas
and let him see another maneager to paint it. Got it?
Got it?Uh-huh.
Ow!
Who loves you, baby?
ANNOUNCER ON TV:Wow, impressive.Three sharp hands landed.
What an amazing displayof punching technique.
The crowd jumps.That punch rocked him.
They sense he's on the vergeof hitting the canvas.
The roaring for anticipationof a knockout.
We are witnessinga great fight.
He's displaying incrediblerhythm with his hands.
Bulldog terrorizinghis opponent. Down he goes!
Hard punch slams himto the canvas.
(WHO LOVES YA BABY PLAYING)
REFEREE: One, two, three,
four, five, six, seven, eight,
(BELL CLANGING)nine, ten. It's over.
(DOORBELL RINGS)
(STAMMERING)
Is... Did... Is Brooke here?
I don't know.
(VIDEO GAME PLAYING)
Brooke?BROOKE: I'll be right there.
(EXPLOSIONS ON TV)
MAN: Cool, baby, cool.
(SCREAMING)
So, how do you and Brookeknow each other?
Well, how don't weknow each other,you know what I mean?
BROOKE: Hi, Paul.Oh, hey. Wow, you look great.
Thank you.
BROOKE: Are you ready to go?Yeah. All set.
So, it was great meeting you.Apple martinis.
All right, come on.That normally does the trick.
Just ignore him.But just two.Three, she'll get sloppy.
You'll become a babysitter.
Oh, and fantasy role playing.She's got a real thingfor lifeguards.
Put some zinc oxideon your noseand she'll lose her mind.
It'll all be over with.
(DOOR CLOSES)
MAN: Y'all want meto stop running?
I mean, the most challengingpart of what I do
is between Februaryand April 15th.
That's what we in the bizlike to call crunch time.
That sounds fascinating.
Good evening.Hi.
Can I start you two offwith something to drink?
Yeah, you know, we're gonnastart with a coupleof apple martinis, please.
No, you know what?I'm gonna... I'm justgonna start with a water.
Well, you can justbring those, just in case.What was I saying?
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So, you know,it's not like it'sall work and no play.
You know, I mean,after April 15th,that's what we in the biz
like to call party time.
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
Excuse me.
Oh, I have to get this.I'm so sorry.
Hello.
ADDIE: Okay, is this whenI'm supposed to call?What?
What do you mean? What?Where? What happened?
Okay, that's great.Wait. What? Oh, all right.
Listen, where...Just don't move.Where are you?
I'm sitting in my kitchen.Sitting? Okay.
(STAMMERING) Don't move.
Don't... I'm gonna beright there, honey. I'm gonnabe right there, okay?
Is everything okay?Oh, my gosh.
That was my best friend.
She just had an accidentand she...She has this knee thing
and she's just very fragile,and I have to go.What?
I can give you a ride.No. No. That's okay.
I'm gonna grab a cab, so...I'm so sorry.
I like your dress.
I think he's fascinating.He's obviouslyread a lot of books.
Yeah. Yeah, I bet he has.
He reads a lot of booksbecause nobodywants to talk to him.
He's a friend of Andrew'swho's always been polite.
It's the best I could doon such short notice, okay?
Well, you know what?Polite is not gonna do it.
We've got to find somebodywho is really gonnamake Gary jealous.
LUPUS:Can I just say something?
You sound a little jealous,Gary.
GARY: Why would I bejealous of some guywith computer skills?
Let's say he doesn't havecomputer skills, but he's gota big old elephant hog on him?
Would that bother youor would you beokay with that?
Not nearly as much as the waythat your mind works.
LUPUS: My mind works great.
So, what's this bullshitI hear about youselling the condo?
Selling that condois ludicrous.
I was waiting forwhen I was gonna get
the how-Gary-always-screws-his-life-upspeech again.
This must be the right time.Look, you tell me,
you just tell me, tell me.Is it happening now?Yeah. Okay.
Tell me howlosing that asset
is gonna get uson the river?
Go ahead, just tell me.Tell me. Somebody tell me.What is this?
What is this? What is it?What is it? Hey!Don't patronize me.
Helicopters.Helicopters. Exactly!
How does losing the assetgive us helicopters?
Dennis, I'm being totallyserious with you. I don'tneed this shit right now.
Hey, you want to cry,cry to Mom.
Nobody's crying.I'm not crying.
I just don't feellike hearing it.There's no feelings here.
This is about moneyand business.Fine, you broke up.
You broke up. Fine.
You know, sad.
Sad is, instead of putting$1,000 into your mortgageevery month,
you waste it on rent.That's what sad is.
Oh, you're broke up.You're confused,brokenhearted.
Heartbreak is nothaving that money
as part of your net worthand then not saving the money,
so that after taxesyou can invest!
You know, you're confused.
Are you finished?Look, I needthe damn tour logs.
Yeah.
Well, I really,really appreciatethe heart to heart.
It was a great talk, Dennis.Thank you.
Oh, well, you're behindthree months. You're stillbehind three months.
And those logs are imperativeto insuring that our booksare straight!
I'll tell you what thoselogs are. Those logs arebullshit is what they are!
You got the receipts.Tally the goddamnthings yourself!
I do, I do!
And I don't appreciate it,because it cuts intomy time with my family.
I could be spending that timewith my family instead ofdoing your books.
I already do the taxes.I do the billing.
I do the hiring, the firing.I do the maintenance.
Come on, what do you do?What is it that you do?
You do the tours!I am the talent, Dennis!
They sign up a monthin advance to see me.
They'll wait in linefor the next busto see me! All right?
So don't drain mewith all this bullshitabout the goddamn tour logs!
GARY: How big's your TV?BOY: Oh, shut up!
How big's your TV,'cause I wanna know if youcan see what's happening.
Oh, wow.You beat a 12-year-old.
I don't care if you're12 years old. You havemore time in the day to play.
I live in the real world,my man,
(DOORBELL RINGING)with billsand responsibilities.
GARY: That's right.
You can't have a handlecalled Mad Dog Killerif you complain every time...
Brooke?Hi, Mike.
Hi.Come on in.
Hold on, Mom. I'm coming.
Is your momin the room with you?
'Cause I hope she can't seewhat's happening.
I hope she can't seewhat's happening.
I'm gonna be justa few more seconds.So, just sit down and relax.
Oh, yeah, no problem.
GARY: I'm sorry?Yeah, why'd you do that?
You take the funout of beating you, becauseyou have an excuse to lose.
Get a life, dude.
Do you think it's possiblethat your mom won'tlove you anymore
if she sees how badyou're losing in the game.
Shut up!
Okay.
All right.
GARY:That's great. You're gonnastay man-to-man with me.
What happenswhen I make a play?
(MIKE GROANING)Making plays, making plays!Making plays!
Well, you know,that's how my peoplelike to handle their business.
While your guysare out partying,mine are running routes.
Try to make a difference.
Mike? I'm ready to go.
Oh, hey,
do you mind if we finishthe game? We gota real nail-biter going here.
Yeah, sure. Of course. Great.
Awesome, all right?
Touchdown.Oh, God, is that pretty.
God, is that pretty.Yeah, I'm a gentleman.
I like to be humble.I'm old school.I don't like to talk a lot.
But at the same time,am I talented?
Tell me how you felt aboutwhat just happened there.
That's him going deep.That's him going...
Work ethic. Work ethic.
I could play this gameforever.
Oh, I could, too.I love it, yeah.I love it, don't you?
I mean, it's the kind of thingwhere literally
I play the game and it's like,four hours go by.
Fate has me highly skilledand loaded with talent.
Oh...
'Cause I think I'mgood enough to figure outhow to beat myself.
GARY: You push yourself.
You push yourselftrying to achievethe impossible,
because you knowthat when that moment comes
that everything you've doneup to that momenthas prepared you for victory!
I can't take creditfor it, Mike.
I got to thankthese little digital guyswith the big hearts.
Does it feel good to bea champion? Yeah.
Yeah, it feels goodto be a champion.Good game.
Hey, Brooke,are you ready to go now?
Oh, yeah, yeah. Sure.MIKE: Great.
Hey, Gary, thanks a lot, man.It was great to meet you.
Absolutely, man.
Come on, Mike. I knowa great little martini bar.
(DOOR OPENING)
(DOOR CLOSES)
LUPUS: Yo.
Hey, man, saddle up.It's time to rope insome talent.
What's up? What do you got?
My place. Tonight. Poker.Call some girls up.
Your roommate is awesome.
Mmm.
Yeah, he's something.
So, where did you goto law school?Oh, Northwestern.
God, Gary's hilarious.
Yeah, he's okay.
Okay? I mean,the guy's all time.
But he's gonna takeChicago tourismby air, land and sea.
And he asked me to joinhis new bowling team.
I mean, how cool is that?
Mmm-hmm.
You know what?I can't do this.I'm so sorry.
Excuse me,would you please pull over?Can you pull over, please?
Hey, wait.
Tell Gary to call me.
GARY: Welcome, everyone,
to the first annualTexas Hold'em No-LimitStrip Poker Tournament.
(GIRLS WHOOPING)
Now, per the e-mailthat Lupus sent, we each haveeight articles of clothing.
Now, if you want to bet,you take off an articleof clothing,
you put it in the center.
If you win,you take back the clothes,you put back on what you bet.
The extras thatother people betwill stay in front of you,
much the same as chips would.
You can go all inat any point,
but as I outlined,you must take offall your clothes to do so.
The game shall last an hour,maybe two,
at which point we will beginthe dance portionof the evening.
(ALL CHEERING)
GARY: Let's get going here.
I need to see the blinds.Small blind. Big blind.
The blinds are one and one.
LUPUS: Come on, ladies.GARY: All right.
Oh, yeah.Let's get going here.
Shuffle up and deal.All right.
I mean, just becausethey were playingvideo games,
that doesn't meanit didn't bother him, right?
Honestly, Brooke,I wish I could tell you,but I wasn't there.
All right, Sally,get the soapout of your mouth.
We're gonna save thatfor when you're 12.
Mike was really,really good-Iooking.
I mean,he's a little bit of a goof,but Gary doesn't know that.
I mean, for all he knows,a sophisticated,
really good-Iooking guytook me out on a date tonight.
I could be in bedwith this guy right nowfor all he knows.
You know?
I'm telling you,if you saw the lookon his face,
Mike got to him.
(CRAZY LITTLE THINGCALLED LOVE PLAYING ON STEREO)
(PHONE RINGING)
Hello.
Hey, it's Riggleman.Great news.
(GARY SNIFFING)
So, how does this work?
I'll bring the cararound frontand you wrap them up to go?
Oh, no, no.We take care of everything.
We deliver it. We hang it.We check the lightand the sun exposure.
Oh. Perfect.Yeah.
Listen, I don't want to betoo forward,
but would you like to havesome dinner with me sometime?
I'm sorry. I have a boyfriend.
Of course.So...
Well, he's a lucky man.BROOKE: Oh, thank you.
I guess I will just haveto keep it to home deliveriesand gallery purchases.
Thank you, though. See you.
Have a good day, Brooke.You, too.
(DOOR OPENING)
(DOOR CLOSING)
Okay, are youout of your mind?
Gary's throwing Greek orgiesin your living room
and you're tellinghot rich guysyou have a boyfriend?
Are you nuts?Hey, look.I'm not exactly innocent here.
Brooke, as an outsiderwith some perspective,I really think you...
Christopher, stop. Stop it.I don't want to hear it.
This has already gottenway out of hand.
I know what I haveto do now, all right?I know what I have to do.
(COMMENTATOR CHATTERING)
(DOOR OPENING)
(DOOR SHUTTING)
Hi.
Did you get my note?Yeah.
Two weeks.
Yep.
I brought some boxesfrom work,
so, you know,if you need anyjust help yourself.
Great. Thanks.
Oh.
Listen, a while agoI got these tickets
for the Old 97's tonight,and I completely forgotabout it, so I...
You know, if you want to go.
Well, how many ticketsdid you get?
I got two.
How much do you want for them?
Oh, no, I'm going. I'm going.
So, then it would just bethe two of us?
Well, yes,and 2,000 other people.
I mean, it's not a big deal,
but, you know, look, you know,I was going to invite Addie,
but I just figuredI'd gotten them for you, so...
Sure. Why not?
Are you sure? I mean,if you don't want them,
I can definitely give themto somebody.No. No, I'll be there.
That sounds...It sounds great.
Okay. All right.It's at the Riv.
So, I'll just leaveyour ticket at Will Call.
Good?Okay.
Okay.
Yeah, so, there.I'll just leave that for him.Okay, great.
Okay, so.Gary Grobowski?
Grobowski, yeah.He should be here in a minute.
He's really...He's oddly tall, so.Oh, okay. Great.
You won't miss him. Thanks.All right, have a good night.
(ALL CHATTERING)
Hi. Can I get a beer, please?Sure.
Actually, make that two beers.
It's gonna be $8.
Excuse me. Sorry.
(CROWD CHEERING)
MILLER: Hello, everybody!
Good evening, Chicago.We're the Old 97's.
(BAND PLAYING TIMEBOMB)
(BAND PLAYING SALOME)
(MELT SHOW PLAYING)
(LOCK CLICKING)
(DOOR OPENING)
(DOOR SHUTTING)
(KNOCKING)
Brooke?
Are you up?Yeah.
Are you okay?I'm fine.
Are you sure?What's up? What do you want?
I just want to sayI'm sorry that I missedthe concert,
and let me knowwhat that ticket cost,I'll pay you back for it.
Just leave me alone, Gary.
I planned on goingto the concert.
It's just, I stopped byJohnny O's and we...
It doesn't fucking matter,okay?
Would you just leave my roomand shut the door?
Jesus.Please.
I didn't really knowthat the concert matteredall that much to you.
Exactly.
Hold on a second here.Let me talk for a second.
Gary...
Brooke. You broke up with me.
Then you have guyscoming over here for dates,
and all of a suddenyou ask me to goto some concert.
I mean, I just figured that,you know.
Gary.
(SNIFFS)
I just... I don't knowhow we got here.
Our entire relationship
I've gone aboveand beyond for you, for us.
And I mean, I've cooked.
I've picked your shit upoff the floor.
I've laid your clothesout for you like you werea four-year-old.
I support you.I supported you, your work.
If we ever had dinneror anything,I make the plans.
I take care of everything andI just don't feel like youappreciate any of it.
I don't feelyou appreciate me.
And all I want is to...Is for you to just show methat you care.
Why didn't you justsay that to me?
Gary, I've tried. I've tried.
Yeah, but never like that.
You might've saidsome things that you meantto imply that, Brooke,
but I'm not a mind reader.
I doubt it would matter.You are who you are.
Just leave me alone, okay?
Right now. Just shut my door.
Listen.
All right, Gary, just, please.Just leave the room.
Listen to me.Gary, just...
I don't want to benear you right now.Listen to me.I just want to...
Please, just shut the door.Please.
(SOBBING)
JOHNNY O: I know. Look, I knowyou feel bad, but, you know,what are you gonna do?
I mean, what does she expect,for me to want to go withthe girl who dumped me?
I don't know. She probablyjust wanted you, you know,to show her the respect
of not standing her upor some shit, who knows?
Well, damn it.I should have just saidno in the first place.
I don't know why I called...
You know what?It's her fault she got hurt.
You shouldn't even feel badabout it. She should haveexpected it from you.
You're a fun guy, okay?Everybody likes you.
You're the quickest guyI know. Anytime we go out,I have a blast.
All right? But, you know,
everybody who knows youknows you're gonna dowhat you want to do.
And if it's not what theother person wants to do,well, that's their problem.
That's bullshit.It's not bullshit.
There's plenty of timesI do shit thatI don't want to do.
That's ridiculous. No.Like when?
That's bullshit to sayabout me.
When have we everdone somethingyou didn't want to do?
You know, I don't know,off the top of my head.I don't keep score...
When's the last timewe went to a Sox game?
The Sox.
Not when they're playingthe Cubs, either.
We always do what you wantto do and she always didwhat you want to do.
It's who you are.
Everybody thinksthat you're their friend,okay?
But the fact of the matter isthat there's not one person
that I know thatyou trust enoughto let close enough
that they could hurt you.
And her big problemis that you really liked her.
I mean, she is the one girlyou really liked.
And no matter what she didand how hard she tried,
you were never gonnalet your guard down.
That poor girlnever stood a chance.
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(AY COSITA LINDAPLAYING ON STEREO)
Marilyn?
Marilyn?MARILYN: Yeah.
I'm sorry. I just...
MARILYN: Oh, just get in here.
Oh, okay.I'm sorry, excuse me.
Marilyn, I just...
I just wanted to let you knowthat today is gonna bemy last day.
I'm gonna be travelingfor a bit.
Here's a blank check.
Write down a number, I don'twant to know what it is,and go back to work.
No, no. It's not about that.
I can't accept that.
Brooke.
Travis, get your gorgeoustuckus out of here.
(SIGHS)
(STEREO STOPS PLAYING)
If you make it to Rome,
search out an establishmentcalled the Padre Negro.
Ask for a strapping youngfellow named Alberto.
Compliments of M. Dean.
Well, thank you.I appreciate that.
Yeah. And, honey,
take as long as you want,because when you're done,
your job will be right herewaiting for you.
And if you discover a paththat doesn't lead back here...
Well, I hope you'll text.
I will.
(CHUCKLES)
And, like I said,the apartment's a mess,but I'm moving, so...
It's okay. Relax aboutthe place. I don't care.
Okay. This'll just takea second.Okay.
(LA VEM A BAIANAPLAYING ON STEREO)
BROOKE: Hello?GARY: Hey. I'm in here.
Don't say anything. I...
How're you doing?
Could I talk to you in privatefor a second?
You know what?This is reallynot a good time,
and obviously you havesomething happening here,
so we'll just be in...No, no, I don't haveanything going on.
This is actually for you.
I'm just gonna wait outside.No, no. Wait.
No, no. Really. It's okay.
I really can't do thisright now.
Brooke, this whole thinghas been really tough on me
and I've tried to actlike it hasn't beenthat tough on me,
but the first Sundayafter me and you broke up,
it all kind of really hit me.
And I thinkit partially hit me
because Sunday was sort ofalways our day that wewould do stuff together.
But I didn't have any ideayou still cared so much.
And, you know,when I saw you cryingthe other night,
that was honestlythe worst moment of my life.
Gary.
Let me just try to saysome of these things here.It's just...
Look,
I know that I've caused youa lot of pain.
And the funny thing is,all I really want to dois make you happy.
I just want to make you smile.
Now, I've had a lot of timeto think aboutsome of the things
that went on, and I know,Brooke, that I don't alwaysdo the right thing
or always saythe right things,
but I am willing to tryto do things differently.
And I'd be happy to gotake a dance class.
Well, I would. Honestly.I would like to go do that.Or go travel.
I mean, I'd even be willingto go to the ballet.
Although I would much ratherdo the dance classor take a trip somewhere.
But I realizethat's not the point.
I realize that the pointisn't that at all,
because it's not reallyabout doing thingsthat you love to do always,
but it is about doing thingswith the person that you love.
And I love you.
Gary.Just give me one second here.
I've missed you so much.
(SOBBING)
I promise you, Brooke,
I will do whatever it isthat I have to doto never hurt you again.
I love you and I'm sorry.
Okay, that's it.That's all I...
Oh, God.That's all I wanted to say,
so you can go ahead nowwith anything thatyou're feeling to say.
I don't know what to say.
Just say whateveryou feel inside.
I don't feel the same way.
I don't. I just...I don't know.
Oh, God.
I just, I think...I don't know,
but I don't think I have
anything left to give.
I'm sorry.
I was hoping for...
It doesn't matter.
Oh, this is nowbeyond awkward.
There's some new guystanding out in the hallway
and I think I'm gonna go.
Okay.
Thank you.
I made a dinner,and I don't know ifit's any good or not,
but you're welcome to have it.
Okay.
Gary, that's really...That's not whatyou think that it is.
It's okay.
I'm gonna go take a walk.
(DOOR OPENING)
(DOOR CLOSING)
(ELEVATOR BELL DINGS)
I'm sorry about that.No.
I'm sorry I imposed.No, that's fine. Please.
So, what do you think?I think you're right.
I think it's great.Good.
Okay.Okay.
So,
I will have that wrapped up.
Packed up, sorry,and delivered.
Thank you for taking the timeto show it to me, okay?
Sure.
Yeah. I'm gonna run.Okay, I'll walk you out.
No, no, no.I can... It's okay.
(DOOR OPENING)
(DOOR CLOSING)
GARY: So, the thing thatI was most afraidof happening happened
and I don't regret it at all,because now she knowshow I feel.
Do you know what I mean?Yeah.
I think,what you got to do nowis really think hard,
because you haveto find somebody
that can't be traced backto either of us
to visit this guy.
What are you talking about?I don't...
The guy who came with her.
I don't need anythingto happen to the guy.
But if they could trace himback to either one of us...
It's not about him.I don't care about that....it's a problem.
The guy, he's not a...They're not dumb.Cops are smart, trust me.
Okay, but he's nota problem to me.Right.
Listen to me.
Promise me that you'renot gonna do anything.
I got you.
It's better if nobody...You don't know anything.
What are you talking about?I'll take care of it.
I don't want youto take care of anything.John, do me a favor.
I'm being serious with you.I know, I know.Smart. You're smart.
No, I'm not.I'm being honest with you.
I don't want anythingto happen to him.Me, either.
Promise me you're notgonna have anyonedo anything to this guy.
But you've gottatell me exactlywhat you're gonna tell them,
if the cops come to you.Because if we tella different story...
Nothing.Promise me one thing.We don't care...
John, I'm gonna go home.I can't do this.I'm exhausted.
Right, go home. Just make sureyour neighbors knowyou're going home.
Do me a favor.They got phone records. Makea couple phone calls tonight.
Especially around 10:00.
Okay. Please don'tdo anything. All right.
I don't mean it like...I mean, honestly.
No, no, I got it.
For all you know,nothing's happening.
I don't want anythingto happen.Right.
Say it louder.
What are you doing hereso early?
Hey.
Everything okaywith you and...Yeah, everything'sgonna be great.
I just wanna getmy day started,but I just wanted to say that
I'm sorry it tookso long for me to...
I love you, Dennis.
(GASPING)It's all right. It's okay.
I'm sorry. I'm gonna godo the stuff.
So, that's itfor all my stuff.
If you want, you could give meyour key and I'll drop it offat Riggleman's.
All right.
Thanks.
Gary.
You know, there'sa thousand things I...
I would have done differently.
Me, too.
Sort of, actually,when I see this space, Irealize that if we didn't have
such a big coffee tableand that oversized couch
a pool tablewould have fit nicely.
Yeah.
Although the oversized couchdid come in very useful thelast couple of weeks, so...
Yes, it... I guess.
Have a good trip.
Thanks.
GARY: Chicago is calledthe Second City
because after theGreat Chicago Fire of 1871,
Chicago was rebuilton its ruins.
The city came backeven bigger and strongerthan it originally was.
So it's not really an insult,it's more of a badge of honorto be called...
The Second City!
Okay. People, you mightbe able to get away
with that reaction at work,but you are on vacation here.
If you can't blow it out here,then where the hellcan you blow it out?
Ladies and gentlemen,show me that you mean it.
Do not make me ask you twice.
Are you ready to see Chicago?ALL: Yes!
I said, are you readyto see Chicago?ALL: Yes!
Are you ready to see Chicago?Shondra, put this babein the air.
Let's go!
There is a bar downstairs.Please enjoy yourself.
I know it's earlyin the morning, but it isChicago in the summer.
Who are we kidding? It's fine.
Go get hopped up,make some bad decisions.
My jokes get better.The buildings look bigger.
It's not so importantthat everything is finished.
It's important thateverything is right.
Well, what time'sthe presentation?
All right, I'll pick upthe rest of the stuffand I'll see you at 6:45.
Great. Bye.
GARY: Brooke!
Hi.Hi.
Wow.
(CHUCKLES)
It's good to see you.It's good to see you.
I'd give you a hug,but my hands are kind offull with all the bags here.
How've you been?I've been really good.
How have you been?I've been good.
Yeah.
You look great.Thank you.
The hair's a little different.Looks nice.Yeah? Oh, yeah.
You've lost some weight.Well, it's verydeceiving, actually.
I've managed to become thinwithout having any real muscleon me whatsoever.
Very tough thing toaccomplish, by the way.I'm proud of myself.
Well, you look terrific.Thanks.
I heard your tripwent really well.It did. It went really well.
Oh, good.It was fun. It was amazing.
I saw so many amazing places.It was just...
But, you know,you do realizehow much you love home.
It's good to have you back.Yeah. It's good to be back.
And the boat.Congratulations on the boat.Thanks.
I'm waiting for itto get warm, and I'm gonnacome by and take a ride.
Well, anytime you want.It'll be on the house.Come on by.
Well, I will, then.
I hope you do.
Definitely.
Well, I got to...I'm going to a meeting, so...
I got to drop these bagsoff anyway, but it's reallygood to see you, Brooke.
Really good to see you.Shouldn't...
Sorry.I'm sorry.
I'm just saying we shouldn'twait so long the next timebefore we...
Yeah....catch up.
We have a lot moreto talk about.Yeah.
So.
Be good.Okay.
Bye.Bye.
(I CAN SEE CLEARLY NOWPLAYING)
(RAINBOW CONNECTION PLAYING)
Subtitled byYIFY Collection